Santa's Son Was Filling An Application Form.. The Form Asked About Quotes

Santa 's son was filling an Application Form..
The form asked about "MOTHER TONGUE"?

Son: Papa main ethe ki likhu.?

Santa : Likh puttar
very LONG & UNCONTROLLED..

Santa calls up White Huose.
Santa : I want to be the next President of USA.
Obama: Are you mad..?
Santa : Why? Is it compulsory..?

Santa was brought to court on charges of drunken driving.
Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.

The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted,
“Order! Order!”

Santa responded immediately,
“Thank you , your honour! I’ll have a scotch and soda.”

Santa at petrol pump: Bhai 1 Rs. ka petrol daal do.
Salesman: Bhai itna sara petrol dalwa kar kahan jaoge.
Santa : Jana kahan hai hum to aise hi paise udaate hain..

Santa : "I LOVE YOU" ka matlab kya hota hai ?
Preeto: Main tumse pyar karti hu.
Santa : Lo kar lo baat.. Angreji me ek sawaal kya puchh liya
Tum to Fida ho gayi.

Someone asks Santa : What is the meaning of
मन्नू भाई मोटर चली पम - पम - पम ..?

Details:
Santa : It means motor is faulty
रुक - रुक कर चलती है ..

Santa opens the door of his car,
when suddenly another car came along
and hit the door,
ripping it off completely.
Santa to Police Officer: Look what they've done to my Car! He whined.

"You are so materialistic, you make me sick!", retorted the officer.
"You're so worried about your car,
that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!"

"Oh no!", replied Santa ,
finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm once was.
"Where's my Rolex..?!"