DON ki talaash 11 mulkon ki police kar rahi hai,
par DON ko pakadna mushkil hi nahi naa-mumkin hai.
Aap khush- naseeb ho jo DON khud aapko Deepawali wish kar raha hai.
Lady to punjab Police -
Ji mere pati 5 din pehle gobhi laane gaye the,
abhi tak waapis nahi aaye.
Punjab Police Inspector-
Te hor koi sabzi bana lo.....
Santa goes to a Police station & says,
"Mujhe phone per dhamkiyaan mil rahi hain."
Police : Kaun phone karta hai?
Santa : Phone company waale bolte hain BILL na diya to KAAT denge.....
Santa was riding on horse.
He jumped the Red Light.
Santa lifts the tail of horse and said,
"Le kar le number note!!"
Policeman: Sir, how did you come to have this accident?
Motorist: Well, the sign just there says, Stop? Look? Listen . and
while i was doing that
the train hit me.
A crime story:
Five friends lived in a room.
There names were Mad, Brain, Fool, Somebody & Nobody.
One day Somebody killed Nobody. That time Brain was bathing.
Mad called Police .
Police : Yes, what's the matter?
Mad: Sir, Somebody killed Nobody.
Police : Are you mad?
Mad: Yes, i am Mad.
Police : Don't you have Brain.
Mad: Sir, Brain is in the bathroom.
Police : You fool.
Mad: Sir, i am Mad,
Fool is reading the message.
Ek poet garibi se tang aa kar daku ban gaya.
Daketi karne ek bank gaya aur kaha:
Taqdeer mein jo hai wahi milega
Hands-Up, koi apni jagah se nahi hilega..
Fir cashier se kaha..
Kuch khwaab meri aankhon se nikaal do
jo kuch bhi tumhaare paas hai jaldi se is bag mein daal do..
Bahut koshish karta hun teri yaad bhulaane ki
koi koshish na kare police ko bulaane ki..
Bhula de mujhko kya jaata hai tera
main goli maar doonga jo kisi ne peecha kiya mera..
Ladka: Mere saath chalogi.?
Ladka: Jaha tum kaho.
Ladki: Ok, police station chalte hain.
Ladka: Lo bataao ab banda apni behen se mazaak bhi nahi kar sakta.
Ek chota bachha road par potty kar raha tha.
Police ne use pakad liya.
Jab use le jaane lage to bachha bola,
"O Kanoon k rakhwalo, saboot to utha lo."
Police caught Santa and Banta for drinking in public place.
Inspector to Banta: Where do you live.?
Banta: I have no fixed address.
Inspector to Santa : And, where do you live.?
Santa : I live in the flat above Banta.
Santa ne ek naamcheen karamaati insaan se poocha:
Aap meri sharab churwa sakte ho..?
Karamaati: Haan kyun nahi.
Santa : To police ne meri 22 bottlein pakri hain. Churwa do.
A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says, "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
Policeman: "I don't care who you know! You're getting fined!"
3 chor Billu, Sonu aur Santa
Police se chhup ke 3 boriyon me ghus gaye.
Police wala aaya, usne pehli bori mein laat maari.
Police wala: Kutta hai.
Dusri bori mein laat maari.
Police wala: Billi hai.
Teesri bori mein laat mari.
Koi aawaz nahi aayi.
Fir mari.. Koi awaz nahi..
20-25 laat mari to andar se Santa chillaaya:
Abe metric fail, AALOO kabhi bolta hai kya..
Santa opens the door of his car,
when suddenly another car came along
and hit the door,
ripping it off completely.
Santa to Police Officer: Look what they've done to my Car! He whined.
"You are so materialistic, you make me sick!", retorted the officer.
"You're so worried about your car,
that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!"
"Oh no!", replied Santa ,
finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm once was.
"Where's my Rolex..?!"
Santa : Drinking te driving dono naal-naal nahi ho sakde.
Banta: Oh kyon bai, police kolo enna darda ae..?
Santa : Je speed breaker aa gaya taa peg dul jaaun..
Policewala agar juice ke thele par
juice pee raha ho to
dekhne waala yahi sochta hai -
Free mein pee raha hoga..
Just imagine life without girls..
Empty streets, silent markets
no crime, police at rest
no sms, mobile companies in losses
no flowers, no perfumes, no valentines
no suicides, no travelling
all the boys straight to Heaven ..
No need to enter the Darwin Police Station
in order to catch a Sandshrew..
♥ Recommended for You »
- Never Say Thanks To Someone Who Loves You Never Say Bye ..
- Bebas Kar Deta Hai Kaanoon E Mohabbat Mujhe Warna Tujhe Itna Chahun Ke ..
- Innocence At It S Best Ek Chota Baby Apni Pregnant Mummy Se ..
- Aap Khafa Ho Gaye To Koi Khushi Na Rahegi Aap Ke ..
- To Succeed In Life You Need Three Things A Wishbone A ..
- Knowing Is Not Enough We Must Apply Willing Is Not Enough ..
- Whenever I Feel That I Miss U I Close My Eyes ..
- On This Holy Day May His Light Guide Our Path May His ..
- Pokémon Go Look Up Away From Your Phone And Both Ways Before ..
- Workers Play Football Managers Play Tennis And CEOs Play Golf Higher You Go ..
लाल बूढ़क्की छू..
Our logo expands to iOLdot - Ik Oankaar Lazeez Dimension of Texting which tries to reflect our ideology.
The purpose of this website is to develop a Dimension to Texting through the Aesthetics of Words by providing Unique, Decent, Pleasant, Pure, Gentle, Clean, Refined, Inoffensive Thought Provoking Wisdom Quotes, Funny Jokes, Shayari, Motivational SMS, Greetings, Wishes, Proverbs, Dohe, Love Messages & much more.. We also encourage you to be part of this journey & share your creative content with us. Play your flute here..
Quality Improvement Initiative
On September 13, 2015 we took an initiative towards delivering high quality content. With every Lazeez SMS you will find two thumbs - one for upvote and one to downvote.
You can cast your vote simply by clicking on the thumb icon.