If You Don't Like The Way I Drive, Stay Off The Quotes

If you don't like the way I drive,
stay off the sidewalk.

Dil ko pata tha woh jaroor aayegi,
Dil ko pata tha woh jaroor aayegi,
par kabhi socha na tha ki woh..
surprise mein apna husband bhi saath laayegi.

Patient to Doctor:
Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai,
uska haath lagte hi main theek ho gayaa.
Doctor: Jaanta hun..
thappad ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi..

Policewala agar juice ke thele par
juice pee raha ho to
dekhne waala yahi sochta hai -
Free mein pee raha hoga..

I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw
that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
- Joan Rivers

रोये वो इस कदर उनकी लाश से लिपटकर
के लाश खुद उठ कर बोली
ले तू मर जा पहले
बदतमीज ऊपर ही चढ़े जा रहा है गर्मी में ..

Roye woh is kadar unki laash se lipatkar
ke laash khud uth kar boli
le tu mar ja pehle
badtameez upar hi chade jaa raha hai garmi mein..

Jab koi itna khas ban jaye
uske baare mein sochna ehsas ban jaye
to maang lena khuda se use zindagi bhar ke liye
isse pehle ki uski MAA kisi aur ki SAAS ban jaye..