If You Don't Like The Way I Drive, Stay Off The Quotes

If you don't like the way I drive,
stay off the sidewalk.

Passenger: Will this bus take me to New Delhi?
Driver: Which part..?
Passenger: All of me, of course..!

A guy walks into work with both of his ears bandaged up.
His boss asks, "what happened to you?"
The man replies "I was ironing my clothes
when my phone rang and
I accidentally answered my iron."
His boss then says "Well, that explains one ear,
what about the other one?"
The man says "Well, I had to call the doctor!"

Keep honking!
I'm reloading!

Lucknow me 2 bache ladh rahe the.
1st : Dekhiye ager aap humari baat nahi manenge
to hum aapki walida mohtarma ki shaan me
gustakhana Kalimat pesh kar denge.
2nd: Huzur phir hum bhi aapke
rukhsaar mubarak pe aisa tamacha raseed karenge ki
gaal mubarak gulab ki maanind chamak uthega.

One special surprise for you, close ur eyes .
10 - 9 - 8 - 7 - 6 - 5 - 4 - 3 - 2 - 1..
Surprise cancelled.
Tum ne aankh band hi nahi ki..

Harbhajan Singh started bhangra
on the score of 33.
Sachin: Why are you dancing..
it's not a 50 or 100 yet..?
Bhajji: Only a punjab board student
can understand the value of 33!