A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says, "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
Policeman: "I don't care who you know! You're getting fined!"

11

English |
jokes.jpg

Patient: Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai
uske haath lagte hi main theek ho gaya.
Doctor: Jaanta hun,
chaante ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi.

42

Hindi

Customer: Waiter, do you serve pigs..?
Waiter: Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.

31

English |

Ek Chinti aur Haathi ko Prem ho gaya..
Chinti ke Maa-Baap ne Shaadi se inkar kar diya..
Reason poocha to kaha:
Ladke ke daant Baahar hai!!

82

Hindi

I'll admit that the Chinese kids
in math class are pretty smart
but doing it with their eyes closed
that's a bit tricky..

02

English |

Father to son: Whenever i beat you,
you don't get annoyed, how you control your anger..?
Son: I start cleaning the toilet seat with your toothbrush.

02

English |

Life mein chaahe kitne bhi dukh mile, ghum mile,
apne aansu beh jaane dena, unhe rokna mat kyonki..
ruke hue paani mein hi Malaria wale machchar ande dete hain.

122

Hindi

Father to son: Sharmaji ki ladki ko dekha hai,
woh exam mein first aai hai.
Son: Usi ko to dekhta tha,
tabhi to fail ho gaya.

115

Hindi

Ladki ek aisi paheli hai,
kabhi teri to kabhi meri saheli hai,
kharchaa karo to bole- Darling, I love u..
na karo to bole- Bhaiya, who r u..?

4730

Hindi

Two hikers were walking through the woods when
they stumble upon a bear.
They immediately take off running, and
the first hiker says to the other:
Do you think we can actually outrun this bear?
The second hiker replies:
I don't have to outrun the bear,
I only have to outrun you..

24

English |

Doctor paagal se: Yeh chithi tum kise likh rahe ho..?
Paagal: Apne aap ko.
Doctor: Achcha isme kya likha hai.
Paagal: Maalum nahi.
Doctor: Kyu..?
Paagal: Abhi mujhe mili kahaan hai..!

103

Hindi