Funny Quotes

ਪਉੜੀ ॥ ਜਿਉ ਜਿਉ ਤੇਰਾ ਹੁਕਮੁ ਤਿਵੈ ਤਿਉ ਹੋਵਣਾ ॥
ਜਹ ਜਹ ਰਖਹਿ ਆਪਿ ਤਹ ਜਾਇ ਖੜੋਵਣਾ ॥
{ਪੰਨਾ 523}

A small boy wrote letter to Shivji:
Oh my dear God , please give me a bicycle.
One week passed. Usko cycle nahi mili.
Tab usne Ganesh ji ki moorti dekhi aur
use apne ghar le aaya.
Again he wrote a letter..
Mr Shivji, aapka beta mere kabze mein hai,
agar beta chaahiye to give me a bicycle in 24 hours..

Ek aadmi STD shop per phone karne jaata hai
aur STD waale ko 2 thappad maarta hai. Kyon..?????
Kyonki STD shop ke baahar likha tha,
dial karne se pehle 2 lagaayein.

Jack n Jill:
Jekwaa n Jilwaa..gaye upar hilwaa..pania bharan ke vaaste
jekwaa gir gawaa..ooka khopdi phoot gawa
aur jilwaa aawat ludkan poora raaste.

Never return to a doctor
whose office plants have died.

Life mein chaahe kitne bhi dukh mile, ghum mile,
apne aansu beh jaane dena, unhe rokna mat kyonki..
ruke hue paani mein hi Malaria wale machchar ande dete hain.

A naughty kid was sitting on the toilet but potty was not coming.
After many efforts he got frustrated and shouted:
Aley aa jaa yaal,
main tujhe khaa thori jaunga..