63Ek ladka - larki hotel main gaye
Waiter: Kya loge?
Larki: Sabjiyo wali gujiya.
Waiter: What ?
Ladka: Yeh momos mang rahi hai.
Hindi |
76Aurangzeb: Senapati batao ki hum
Shivaji ko kyun nahi dhund pa rahe hain?
Senapati: Kyunki Maharaj hum Mooghal (Mughal) hain Google nahi..
English |
21A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.
A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.
At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"
English |
02Father to son: Whenever i beat you,
you don't get annoyed, how you control your anger..?
Son: I start cleaning the toilet seat with your toothbrush.
English |
32Hansa: AUTOMATICALLY matlab?
Praful: Jab auto mein baith kar koi ladki ganji ho jaaye
to usko kehte hain,
AUTO-MEIN-TAKLI!!!
Hindi
4830Ladki ek aisi paheli hai,
kabhi teri to kabhi meri saheli hai,
kharchaa karo to bole- Darling, I love u..
na karo to bole- Bhaiya, who r u..?
Hindi
91Patient to Doctor:
Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai,
uska haath lagte hi main theek ho gayaa.
Doctor: Jaanta hun..
thappad ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi..
Hindi
01A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martin us.
"You mean a martini?" the bartender asks.
The Roman replies,
"If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!"Details:
Most words that end in "us" are pluralized by changing the "us" to "i"
(e.g. cactus - cacti, genius - genii, Stimulus - stimuli) and most of those words have Latin roots. So the Latin scholar thinks of "martini" as being plural, so he singularises it by calling it a "martinus".
English |
21Don’t steal, don’t lie and don’t cheat.
- Vidhi
The government hates competition..
English |
15A mosquito cried out in pain:
"A chemist has poisoned my brain!"
The cause of his sorrow
was para-dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane.
English |
20Cricketer ka beta: Arre dekho maa..
papa sixer per sixer maare jaa rahe hain!!
Maa: Beta theek se dekho..
advertisement hoga.
Hindi
31Customer: Waiter, do you serve pigs..?
Waiter: Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.
English |
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