42A innocent Dhamki:
As the thief was leaving the house,
the kid woke up and said,
"Mera school bag bhi le kar jaao..
warna main mummy ko uthaa doonga."
Hindi
10I may be fat, but you're ugly - I can lose weight..!
English |
11A man in US saw a dog about to bite a lady.
He kicks the dog & the dog dies.
Newspaper reports - Brave US citizen saves lady from dog.
Man told newspapers that he is not a US citizen,
so report changed - Foreigner saves lady from dog.
Man told that he hails from Pakistan.
Report got changed - Terrorist attacked local dog.
English |
21I am on a Mission.
Mission to avoid you,
to forget you,
to get rid of you,
to not to talk or meet you,
in short - Mission Impossible..
English |
62Boy: Yamraj ji, mujhe waqt se pehle kyun utha liya?
Yamraj: Dimag mat chaat, March mein closing hai,
target poora karna hai.
Hindi
21A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.
A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.
At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"
English |
02If school is not the place to sleep ,
then home is not a place to study..
English |
10Indian Air Force - IAF pilots training camp advice:
"Always try to keep the number
of landings you make
equal to the number of take
offs you make."
English |
00A kid went late for school.
- HARRY
Teacher : Why are you late ?
Kid : Madam, my parents were fighting.
Teacher: So what If they were fighting,
still you could have come on time.
Kid : Actually, my one shoe had been taken by dad and other by mom.
English |
02RAM lanka jit ke lout rahe the tab,
Shurpnkna boli- Prabhu mera kya hoga?
RAM:kalyug me ayodhya par raj krogi,Par vivah phir bhi nahi hoga
Naam hoga "MAYAWATI".
Hindi
10Why India is not yet developed?
Though population is 100 crore?
Because 7.9 crore are retired,
30 crore in state government jobs,
17 crore in central government jobs
(Both don't work efficiently).
1.1 crore IT professional
(They don't work for India).
25 crore in school,
2 crore under 5 years,
15 crore unemployed,
1.2 crore you can find anytime in hospitals.
Statistics say 79,99,997 people are in jail.
Rest two are you and me.
You are busy with your mobile .
How can i handle India alone..?
English
40Some people don't say thanks
after receiving a gift.
They just say,
अरे इसकी क्या ज़रुरत थी ..
Hindi |
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