01Marriage involves mathematics for it -
Doubles joys,
Halves sorrows, and
Quadruples expenses.
English |
11Well I have a microphone
and you don't
so you will listen to every damn word
I have to say!
- Adam Sandler
English |
10Why India is not yet developed?
Though population is 100 crore?
Because 7.9 crore are retired,
30 crore in state government jobs,
17 crore in central government jobs
(Both don't work efficiently).
1.1 crore IT professional
(They don't work for India).
25 crore in school,
2 crore under 5 years,
15 crore unemployed,
1.2 crore you can find anytime in hospitals.
Statistics say 79,99,997 people are in jail.
Rest two are you and me.
You are busy with your mobile .
How can i handle India alone..?
English
32Taj Mahal ko dekh kar bola Shah Jahaan ka pota..
Taj Mahal ko dekh kar bola Shah Jahaan ka pota..
Aaj humaaraa bhi bank balance hota agar dada deewana na hota!
Hindi
22Teacher to class - A for..?
Class - Apple.
Teacher - Zor se BOLO
Class - JAI MATA DI..
Hindi
121A stranger to a child: Beta, itni chocolate khaoge to bimaar ho jaoge!
- Vidhi
Bachcha: Mere dadaji 100 saal jiye thhe.....
Stranger: Vo chocolate khate thhe?
Bachcha: Nahi vo apne kaam se kaam rakhte thhe....
Hindi |
00Camera-man studio mein ek chote bachche se:
Meri taraf dekho beta, is camera se ek kabootar niklega.
Bachcha: Focus adjust kar, gawaaron waali batein naa kar.
Facebook per lagaani hai.
Hindi |
10Someday your prince will come.
Mine took a wrong turn and is too stubborn to ask for directions.
English |
31A scholar was lecturing when all the lights in the auditorium went out.
He asked members of the audience to raise their hands.
As soon as they had all complied, the lights went on again.
He then said,
"Prove wisdom of Old Chinese saying: 'Many hands make light work."
English |
10Heights of :
1) Fashion?
Lungi with a zip.
2) Laziness?
Asking lift for morning walk.
3) Craziness?
Get blank paper xerox.
4) Honesty?
Pregnant woman taking 2 tickets.
5) De-hydration?
Cow giving milk powder.
6) Hope?
A 99 yr. Old woman going for Rs. 295/- recharge to get lifetime incoming.
7) Stupidity?
Looking through key hole of a glass door.
8) Height of free time?
You are reading this whole message..
English |
52Ladka: Mere saath chalogi.?
Ladki: Kaha?
Ladka: Jaha tum kaho.
Ladki: Ok, police station chalte hain.
Ladka: Lo bataao ab banda apni behen se mazaak bhi nahi kar sakta.
Hindi
00Agar aap kahin jaldi mein jaa rahe hain
aur Kaali Billi aapke aage se guzar jaaye
to iska matlab
Kaali Billi aap se zyaada jaldi mein hai..
Hindi |
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