Haryanvi Jaat riding a bicycle hits a girl.
Girl: Ghanti nahin maari jaati kya?
Jaat: Re Chori, baawli hai ke?
Poori cycle maar di.. ib ghanti alag se maaru ke???

40

Hindi

funny.jpg

Bholu: Pandit ji meri shaadi nahi ho rahi hai..koi upaaye bataao..
Pandit ji: Kaise hogi bhai..?
Kundli mein sukh hi sukh likha hai, mauj karo..!!

23

Hindi |

Question: Why Santa gave Oreo biscuit to
Chhota Bheem (chota bhim),
Chutki, Raju, Jaggu, Kalia and Dholu - Bholu..?

Answer: Because ladoo mein cream nahi hoti.

21

Hindi |

Father to son: Sharmaji ki ladki ko dekha hai,
woh exam mein first aai hai.
Son: Usi ko to dekhta tha,
tabhi to fail ho gaya.

195

Hindi

Couple silent in bed.
Wife thinks:
Why is he not talking to me?
Is he thinking of another woman ?
Does he like someone else?
Is he seeing someone?
Don't I appeal to him anymore?
Are wrinkles showing on my face?
Is he trying to dump me?
Is he now finding me ugly?
Have I put on weight?
Does my make up repel him these days.
Is he upset with my nagging?
WHY IS HE UPSET?

Husband thinking: Damnit man, Dhoni se kuch nahi ho Sakta, aur yeh Gautam gambhir..

11

Hindi

Lalooji ek mahina bush se
english ki training le kar aaye.
Ek din ek phone aaya to lalooji bole:
"Who iz ispeaking?"
Jawaab aaya:
"Hum sasoora BUSHWAA..!!"

20

Hindi

ਨਿਕੰਮੀ ਔਲਾਦ ਦੀ ਜਿੰਨੀ ਘੱਟ ਸੇਵਾ ਕੀਤੀ ਜਾਏ
ਘਰ ਉੰਨਾ ਜ਼ਯਾਦਾ ਤਰੱਕੀ ਕਰਦਾ ਹੈ ..

337

Punjabi |

A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.

A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.

At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"

21

English |

Woh mile bhi to examination hall mein,
Tum hi batao paper karte ya mohabbat ..

131

Hindi |

Ek aadmi STD shop per phone karne jaata hai
aur STD waale ko 2 thappad maarta hai. Kyon..?????
Kyonki STD shop ke baahar likha tha,
dial karne se pehle 2 lagaayein.

146

Hindi

At Traffic Signal Boy Friend to Girl Friend :
Jaan main tumhari aankhon main sara jahan dekh sakta hu.
Pass me ek ladka without helmet khada tha.
Yeh sunte hi bola: Bhai sahab, mujhe sirf itna bata do ki
Aage chaurahe par Helmet ki checking ho rahi hai ya nahi..

- Hemant Singh

32

Hindi |

Ek bachcha paida hote hi nurse se bola,
"Light hai kya?"
Nurse bole: No
Bachcha: Oh my God , fir se Bihar mein paida ho gaya..

20

Hindi

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