00Mr. Bean called hospital to enquire abt his pregnant wife
but call went to cricket stadium.
Bean: What's the condition?
Reply: 7 are already out,
3 still to come &
first one was Duck.
English
00Judge: Sach-sach batao tumne apni biwi per haath kyun uthaaya..?
Mulzim: 3 baaton ki wajah se
1. Uska chehra meri taraf nahi tha
2. Uske haath mein belan nahi tha
3. Aur sabse badi wajah,
mere bhaagne ke liye darwaaza khula tha..
Hindi |
00Funny ironic word combinations
1. Clearly misunderstood
2. Exact estimate
3. Small crowd
4. Act naturally
5. Found missing
6. Fully empty
and
7. HAPPILY MARRIED!!
English |
208Travel time from Jammu to Delhi
will now be reduced to just 6 hours but
from Delhi to Noida & Gurugram
can be 8 hours due to rains..
English |
01A man goes skydiving.
After a fantastic free fall he pulls the rip cord to open his parachute
but nothing happens. He tries everything but can't get it open.
Just then another man flies by him, going UP.
The skydiver yells, "Hey, you know anything about parachutes?"
The man replies, "No, you know anything about gas stoves?"
English |
23Bholu: Pandit ji meri shaadi nahi ho rahi hai..koi upaaye bataao..
Pandit ji: Kaise hogi bhai..?
Kundli mein sukh hi sukh likha hai, mauj karo..!!
Hindi |
30Commerce professor asks a student:
What is the most important source
of finance for starting business..?
Student: Father-in-law
English |
20Biwi: Mujhe samajh nahi aata paisae kahan rakhun,
- Kannan
jahan chupati hun humaara beta chura leta hai.
Husband : Uski books mein chipa do, yeh kabhi hath nahi lagata..
Hindi |
02If school is not the place to sleep ,
then home is not a place to study..
English |
50A cute question:
Kid: Mom, kya aapne mujhe paida hone se pehle dekha tha..?
Mom: Nahi to.
Kid: To phir paida hone ke baad pehchana kaise..?
Hindi
10Chali jaati hain aaye din woh Beauty Parlour mein sajne
aur karti hain baal kaale..
Magar yeh unko kaun samjhaaye
ki mumkin hi nahi kisi KishMish ka
fir se Angoor ho jana..
Hindi |
20Inerviewer: What is recession?
Candidate: When 'Wine & Women' get replaced by
'Water & Wife ' that critical phase of life is called recession.
English
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