Banta and his wife waiting for the train..
itne mein Punjab Mail aayi.
Banta bhaag kar train mein chadtaa hai and says to her wife
Jab Punjab Female aaye tab tu bhi aa jaana.

30

Punjabi

When TITANIC was drowning, an Italian asks Santa ,
"How far is land?"
Santa :"4 kms."
Italian jumps into sea and asks,
"Which direction?"
Santa : "DOWNWARDS..!"

00

English

Santa car mein battery lagwaane gaya.
Mechanic ne poocha: Exide ki laga du?
Santa sochne laga, fir bola: Baar-baar kaun aayega,
Dono side ki laga de..

00

Hindi

Santa : Mere 4 beto me se 3 to engineer ban gaye,
Lekin kambakht ek DAAKU ban gaya.
Banta: To usko ghar se nikal do,
Santa : Yai to dikkat hai,
kama ke To sirf wahi lata hai.

01

Hindi

Couple in theatre:
Husband : Darling, mujhe to tumhaari aatma se pyaar hai,
tumhaara jism to main kutton ko daal dun!!
Santa sitting on back seat: BHOW BHOW..BHOW BHOW..

10

Hindi

Santa returns book to library, bangs it on table & says - What a shit..?
"I read the whole book, too many character, no story at all"..?
Librarian: So, you are the one who took the Telephone Directory..

00

English |

Santa : Ek chor ne mujhe chaku dikha ke lut liya,
Banta: Tere paas to hamesha gun hoti hai..?
Santa : Haan.. 2 lakh ki hai
maine chupaa li thi varna woh bhi le jaata..

10

Hindi |

Santa was caught for speeding and produced in court.
Judge asked: 30 days or 300 rupees?
Santa replied: I will take money.

00

English

Muderer: Try karna umar-kaid ho, Faansi na ho.
Santa : Don't worry. Case poora apne haath mein hai.

After Court.

Muderer: Kya hua..?
Santa : Bahut mushkil se umar-kaid karwaai hai,
Adaalat to riha kar rahi thi.

22

Hindi |

Santa underwear lene gaya.
Dukaandaar ne usko Rs. 500 ka underwear dikhaya.
Santa : Roz pehn-ne wala de,
party wear nahi chaahiye.

20

Hindi

A kid asked Santa : Are you Punjabi?
Santa (proudly) : Yes.
Santa : But how do you know?
Kid : You are wearing a Kada.
Santa asks the kid : Are you Punjabi too?
Kid : Yes.
Santa : Do you drink Lassi daily?
Kid : No
Santa : Sorry, but then you are not a Punjabi.
Kid : Oh, I am Haryanvi.
Santa : Do you eat Ghee daily?
Kid : Yes
Santa (happily) : Yes, then you are Haryanvi..

00

English |

SnowPoint: Doctor, which soap you use..??
Santa : Gopal soap, Gopal paste, Gopal brush..
SnowPoint: Doctor, is Gopal an International Company..??
Santa : No, Gopal is my room-mate.

00

English

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