A Very Wealthy Old Man Was Dying And Summoned His Quotes

A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.

A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.

At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"

Salesman cheerfully greeted
the person entering showroom.
Salesman - Sir, May I help you.
Man - Ahmm..
Salesman - Sir, we have got fresh arrivals
and are offering 10 percent discount.
Man - But..
Salesman - Sir, you can also avail
extra benefits by joining our loyalty program.
What would you like to have Sir.
Man - My dog.

Customer: Waiter, do you serve pigs..?
Waiter: Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.

Engg. Student: Sir humne aisi cheez banayi hai jisse hum
deewar ke us paar bhi dekh sakte hain.....

Sir: Wow, fantastic! Kya hai woh?

Student:
Suraakh.......

Banana: Why are you crying?
Apple: All of them cut and eat me.
Banana: Poda! You are better than me.
All of them remove my dress & eat me.

A man gave advt. in matrimonial column:
"PATNI CHAHIYE"
He got several replies saying:
"MERI LE JAA"

Don’t steal, don’t lie and don’t cheat.
The government hates competition..