Tintumon: Aaj kal TV mein channel bahut kharaab aa rahe hain.
Santa : Nahi to, humaare papa ne to TataSky lagwaa liya hai,
ab to bilkul theek hain, aap apna cable check karwa lo.

00

Hindi |

Hindi Grammer Teacher:
Wo ladko se hans kar baat karti hai.
Batao is sentence me ladki kya hai?

Santa : Sir, ladki bigdi hui hai aur setting karna chati hai.

- Vikas Umrao
00

Hindi |

Banta: When I was born,
military people fired 21 canons.
Santa : Wow.. All missed the target.

10

English |

Girl: how many apples can you eat on an empty stomach ?
Santa : I can eat 6 apples
Girl : you can eat only 1 apple on empty stomach bcoz
when you eat the 2nd apple tht's not an empty stomach..
Santa : Wow super joke I'l tell my friend ..

Santa to friend : how many apples you can eat on an empty stomach..?
friend : I can eat 10
Santa : Pagal.. 6 bolta to mast joke sunata..

11

Hindi |

Sardaarji aapko logo ne kyon maara..?
Sardaar: Arrey yaar meri photo bus mein gir gayi thi.
Maine kaha, madam zaraa saree upar karna,
mujhe photo leni hai.

01

Hindi

Kaale Badal chaaye hoye c te sante nu apni gf to thappar pe gaya...

Kyon?
.

.
Kyoki ohne gana gata
"Aaj din chadya tere rang varga"..

10

Punjabi |

एक बार संता अपनी पत्नी जीतो के साथ कॉफी पीने जाता है और
दो हॉट कॉफी ऑर्डर करता है,
कुछ देर बाद जैसे ही वेटर कॉफी लेकर आता है तो संता, जीतो से कहता है:
संता: ओ जीतो जल्दी-जल्दी कॉफी पी ले अगर ठण्डी हो गई तो फ़ालतू में ज्यादा पैसे देने पड़ेंगे!
जीतो: क्यों क्या हुआ? मुंह जलवाने से तो अच्छा है कि, यह थोड़ी ठंडी हो जाए उसके बाद पिएं!
संता: पागल तूने इनकी रेट लिस्ट नहीं देखी, हॉट कॉफी 15 रुपए और कोल्ड कॉफ़ी 45 रुपए की है!

- Hemant Singh

22

Hindi |

Teacher: How many planets are there?
Santa : Mercury, Venus, Jupiter, ...wagerah...wagerah...
Teacher: Aur batao?
Santa : Aur bas sab badhiya! Mata rani ki kirpa hai. Aap sunao.

20

Hindi

Santa first time travelling in plane.
Plane began to run on run-way.
Santa got angry and said,
"Saalio, jahaaz ta agge hi char ghante late aa,
te tussi sadko-sadki paa liya."

10

Punjabi

Santa and Banta were playing chess.
Santa : Let's wrap up.
Banta: Yeah, anyways just your rook
and my knight are left..

Then Vishwanathan Anand comes there.
VA: Come, let's play chess.

Santa -Banta: No way, you will beat us.
VA: Ok.. You both can play as a team.
Santa -Banta: Still we will lose.
VA: Ok, i will play with left hand.
Santa -Banta: Yeah, then it's fine.

Obviously, Santa Banta lost the game and VA leaves.
Santa : It was shameful, he beat us even with left hand.
Banta: He fooled us.
Santa : How?
Banta: He must be left-handed.

01

English |

Santa was caught for speeding and produced in court.
Judge asked: 30 days or 300 rupees?
Santa replied: I will take money.

00

English

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