Tintumon: Aaj kal TV mein channel bahut kharaab aa rahe hain.
Santa : Nahi to, humaare papa ne to TataSky lagwaa liya hai,
ab to bilkul theek hain, aap apna cable check karwa lo.
Santa was experimenting with a cockroach.
He cut one of his legs and told it to walk.
The cockroach began moving slowly.
He continued till all legs were cut.
Then he told it to walk, but it didn't move.
So he wrote the inference:
If all the legs of a cockroach were cut,
it loses it's ability to hear.
Government promised jiske 5 bachche hain oose ghar degi.
Santa ke 3, usne Wife se kaha: Padosan ke 2 bhi mere hain,
unko lata hun.
Lane ke baad:
Santa : Apne 3 kaha gaye?
Wife : Jinke the woh le gaye.
Accident ke baad.
Driver: Maine car ki headlight ON kar ke bataya tha ki
pehle mjhe nikalne do.
Santa : Maine bhi to wiper chala ke bataya tha ki 'na kaake na'.
One afternoon, Banta came to Santa 's home.
Santa : Chalo dinner karte hain
Banta: Par abhi to dopeher hai aur dopeher ko to lunch karte hain..?
Santa : Oh yara khana to kal raat waala hi hai na..
Santa : Ye bata ki duniya me kitne desh hai?
Banta: Kar di na paaglon waali baat,
duniya me ek hi desh hai INDIA,
baaki sab to Videsh hain..!!
Santa : Ek chor ne mujhe chaku dikha ke lut liya,
Banta: Tere paas to hamesha gun hoti hai..?
Santa : Haan.. 2 lakh ki hai
maine chupaa li thi varna woh bhi le jaata..
Teacher : 100 dollars can be divided into how many people
if each person should get 30 dollars?
Santa : Unlimited.
Teacher : Are you nuts?
You can't do that.
Santa explains and teacher faints..
Santa : I will give 30 dollars to 3 people
and then will take back from them and
then I will give those to another 3 people
and then take back from them too
and so on..
A sardaar prays daily for two hours:
Hey Waheguru, meri lottery lagaa davo.
After 11 years Waheguru angrily appears and says:
Oye Khoteyaa, ik vaari ticket taan lae..
Santa & Banta were crossing river on a boat.
Banta - Hey ! this boat is sinking.
Santa - Doobne de yaar, kaun si apni hai..
Santa was commiting suicide.
Banta: Ki hoya?
Santa : Yaar, meri biwi bhaag gayi mere dost ke saath.
Banta: To tu doosri shaadi kar le, suicide kyon?
Santa : Oye banteyaa main apne dost ke bina nahi reh sakta.
Santa was reading a blank paper.
Banta: ye kya hai.
Santa : meri glfrnd ka luv leter hai.
Banta: magar ye to khali hai. Santa : ajkal hum bat nahi karte.
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लाल बूढ़क्की छू..
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