00Santa returns book to library, bangs it on table & says - What a shit..?
"I read the whole book, too many character, no story at all"..?
Librarian: So, you are the one who took the Telephone Directory..
English |
01Santa : Mere 4 beto me se 3 to engineer ban gaye,
Lekin kambakht ek DAAKU ban gaya.
Banta: To usko ghar se nikal do,
Santa : Yai to dikkat hai,
kama ke To sirf wahi lata hai.
Hindi
10Santa first time travelling in plane.
Plane began to run on run-way.
Santa got angry and said,
"Saalio, jahaaz ta agge hi char ghante late aa,
te tussi sadko-sadki paa liya."
Punjabi
10Santa : Yeh kela kaise diya?
Pundit: 1 rupee.
Santa : 60 paise ka deta hai?
Pundit: 60 paise mein to sirf chilka doonga.
Santa : Le 40 paise, chilka rakh ke sirf kela de de.
Hindi
00Santa was driving a car zigzag and rashly.
Traffic cop caought him.
Santa : Sir, I am learning driving.
Cop: Without instructor?
Santa : It's a correspondence course.
English
00Tintumon: Aaj kal TV mein channel bahut kharaab aa rahe hain.
Santa : Nahi to, humaare papa ne to TataSky lagwaa liya hai,
ab to bilkul theek hain, aap apna cable check karwa lo.
Hindi |
21Do bhoot galaan kar rahe si.
Pehla bhoot: Yaar tu kadi sardaar dekhe ne?
Doosra bhoot: Sardaar-sardoor kuch ni hunde,
sab mann da vehm hai, dari na.
Punjabi
00Banta: Kya hua Santa , chup kyun hai..?
Santa : Aaj mere dost ka Happy Birthday hai aur
mujhe sms bhejna hai.
Banta: Yeh to khushi ki baat hai,
fir tu udaas kyun hai..?
Kya mobile mein balance nahi hai..?
Santa : Mere paas mobile nahi hai.
Hindi |
31Wife -Aji sunte ho ghar me namak khatam ho gaya he
daal me kya daalu,
Santa -Dimaag to h hi nhi
nya colgate active salt daal de
usme namak hai
Hindi
10Santa joined Army, given ak-47, puzzeled Santa asks Major,
"Sir, is bandook ki nali saamne rakhun ya ulta?"
Major: Kisi bhi tarah rakho, faayedaa desh ka hi hoga.
Hindi
00Teacher : 100 dollars can be divided into how many people
if each person should get 30 dollars?
Santa : Unlimited.
Teacher : Are you nuts?
You can't do that.
Santa explains and teacher faints..Details:
Santa : I will give 30 dollars to 3 people
and then will take back from them and
then I will give those to another 3 people
and then take back from them too
and so on..
English |
00Santa standing on a platform, suddenly jumps on railway track.
A man shouts Sardaarji mar jaaoge.
Santa : Maregaa to tu saale,
suna nahin train platform no. 1 par aa rahi hai.
Hindi
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