Well I have a microphone
and you don't
so you will listen to every damn word
I have to say!
- Adam Sandler

11

English |

funny.jpg

2 beggars met, 2 software engineer met.
Both asked each other the same question.


So which platform are you working on?

30

English

Aaj ke baad na peeyenge sharaab
humne kasam khaai hai,
aur isi khushi mein
ek peti aur mangwaai hai.

10

Hindi

Funny ironic word combinations
1. Clearly misunderstood
2. Exact estimate
3. Small crowd
4. Act naturally
5. Found missing
6. Fully empty
and
7. HAPPILY MARRIED!!

00

English |

A man was seen fleeing down the hall of the hospital just before his operation.
"What's the matter?" he was asked.
He said, "I heard the nurse say, 'It's a very simple operation, don't worry, I'm sure it will be all right."
"She was just trying to comfort you, what's so frightening about that?"
"She wasn't talking to me. She was talking to the doctor.

00

English |

Dr. to patient's Friend : Agar ek ghanta pehle le aate
to shaayad hum ise bacha lete.
Friend : Abe saale, 15 minute pehle to accidnt hua hai.

30

Hindi

New Teacher:
Students tell ur name and hobbies.
Now Boys start:
I am Robert, My hobby is watching bubble in the bath tub.
I am Rohit, My hobby is watching bubble in the bath tub.
I am Raghu, My hobby is watching bubble in the bath tub.
Teacher: I wonder u all have same hobbies, next girl..
I am bubble.

20

English

Cat: How old are you?
Elephant: I am just five.
Cat: 5? How come, you look so big?
Elephant: I am a complan boy.
Elephant how old r u?
Cat: I am just 30.
Elephant: 30? But you are looking so small?
Cat: I am a santoor girl..

10

English

What is attitude ..?
Three ants saw an elephant coming.
1st ant - We'll kill him.
2nd ant - We'll break his legs.
3rd ant - Leave him dude, he's alone,
and we r three.. that won't be fair.

120

English

Commerce professor asks a student:
What is the most important source
of finance for starting business..?
Student: Father-in-law

30

English |

संता की मौत बिजली गिरने से हो गई
पर उसकी लाश मुस्कुराते हुए मिली
भगवान ने पुछा ऐसा क्यों ?
संता - मैनु लगा जी कोई फोटो खींच रहा है ..

Santa ki maut bijli girne se ho gai
par uski laash muskuraate hue mili
Bhagwan ne poocha aisa kyun?
Santa - Mainu laga ji koi photo kheench raha hai..

41

Hindi |

Gandhiji chale gaye,
Nehruji chale gaye,
Bhagat Singh ji bhi chale gaye,
Aajkal meri bhi tabeeyat theek nahi rehti
pataa nahi desh ka kya hoga..??

31

Hindi

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