Ladki Pataane Ka Tarika: Chupke Se Uske Peeche Jaa Kar Use Quotes

Ladki pataane ka tarika:
Chupke se uske peeche jaa kar use daraao.
Agar woh hasi to samjho pat gai..
Agar gussa hui to zor-zor se chillao,
Didi darr gayi..Didi darr gayi..

A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says, "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
Policeman: "I don't care who you know! You're getting fined!"

Ek ladka - larki hotel main gaye
Waiter: Kya loge?
Larki: Sabjiyo wali gujiya.
Waiter: What ?
Ladka: Yeh momos mang rahi hai.

Kashmir ki romantic waadiyon mein,
barfeeli hawaaon mein,
jheel ke kinaare baithe Raanjhe ko
Heer ne kya kahaa..??
Ve moeyaa Hero na ban..
Sweater pehen le.

Ek conductor ki shadi ho rahi thi,
jab Dulhn phero ke waqt uske paas aa kar baithi to woh bola,
"Thoda paas ho ke baith, ek sawari aur baith sakti hai."

A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.

A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.

At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"

मैं गया उसकी गली में
बोला दिल से दिल लगा लो
जब देखा उसकी मम्मी को
तो बोला जूते - चप्पल ठीक करा लो ..

Main gaya uski gali mein
bola dil se dil laga lo
jab dekha uski mummy ko
to bola joote-chappal theek kara lo..