Policeman: Sir, how did you come to have this accident?
Motorist: Well, the sign just there says, Stop? Look? Listen . and
while i was doing that
the train hit me.

20

English

jokes.jpg

Patient to Doctor:
Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai,
uska haath lagte hi main theek ho gayaa.
Doctor: Jaanta hun..
thappad ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi..

91

Hindi

A lady was driving for the first time on a highway.
Her husband called on her cellphone -
Be careful Honey, it's coming on radio that
somebody is driving on the wrong side of the road.
Lady replied - Somebody..?
Those stupids are in hundreds..

20

English |

Salesman cheerfully greeted
the person entering showroom.
Salesman - Sir, May I help you.
Man - Ahmm..
Salesman - Sir, we have got fresh arrivals
and are offering 10 percent discount.
Man - But..
Salesman - Sir, you can also avail
extra benefits by joining our loyalty program.
What would you like to have Sir.
Man - My dog.

21

English |

Funny Slogans
RTO - Donate blood, but not on road.
Forest Deptt. - Shoot birds with camera,
not with guns.
Kingfisher - Fly with us, not on plane,
but with Beer..

31

English |

Na jaane woh humse kya chupaati thi,
kuch tha uske honto pe magar na jaane kyon sharmaati thi,
jab humne muh khulwaa ke dekha..
to pataa chalaa..
woh to gutkha khaati thi!!

134

Hindi

Who Killed Osama Bin Laden??
ROBIN BROWN, ANDY PHILIP, JAKOB MURPHY,
NORMAN GRACE, IAN KEPLING??
Recognized these guys?
These are the names of those Navy Seals
who killed Osama Bin Laden!
Now you..

- Sumit Nigam

13

English |

A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.

A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.

At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"

21

English |

Father to son: Whenever i beat you,
you don't get annoyed, how you control your anger..?
Son: I start cleaning the toilet seat with your toothbrush.

02

English |

Joe: We will soon become rich.
Jill: How?
Joe: Tomorrow my mathematics teacher will teach me
how to convert paisa into rupees.

140

English

If a Fat Girl is waiting for bus at bus stop
what will you call her in One Word..?
Answer - MotiVating..

43

Hindi |

Who was the first Indian woman
to fly abroad without passport and visa?
Guess?
Sita with Ravan to Sri Lanka.

65

English

Recommended for You »

  1. Log Muntazir Hi Rahe Ke Humein Toota Dekhein Hum Zabt Kart Karte ..
  2. Yaara Yaari Da Maan Rakhi Dimaag Ch Nahi Meri Aapne Dil ..
  3. Ye Dosti Chiraag Hai Ise Jalaaye Rakhna Ye Dosti Gul Hai Ise Khilaaye ..
  4. Win A Heart Which Never Breaks Give A Smile Which Never ..
  5. Jab Paas Ho Tab Khaas Ho Jab Dooor Ho Tab Ehsaas ..
  6. Relationship Between Two Person Is Like The Relationship Between The Hand ..
  7. A Mechanic Was Removing Some Engine Parts From A Bike When ..
  8. The Saddest Aspect Of Life Right Now Is That Science Gathers ..
  9. You Can See And You Can Listen But You Have To ..
  10. English Se Mujhe Bahut Pyaar Hai Thodi Mehngi Zaroor Hoti Hai Lekin ..

Share & Let Everyone Read









Draw shape below and click submit button to send us your message:
आओ खेलें

लाल बूढ़क्की छू..

anagram quiz

About Us


Our logo expands to iOLdot - Ik Oankaar Lazeez Dimension of Texting which tries to reflect our ideology.

The purpose of this website is to develop a Dimension to Texting through the Aesthetics of Words by providing Unique, Decent, Pleasant, Pure, Gentle, Clean, Refined, Inoffensive Thought Provoking Wisdom Quotes, Funny Jokes, Shayari, Motivational SMS, Greetings, Wishes, Proverbs, Dohe, Love Messages & much more.. We also encourage you to be part of this journey & share your creative content with us. Play your flute here..



What's more


moderated-content-kids-safe

Moderated Content

Safe for people of all Age Groups including Children.
sms-api-always-win

API

Display SMS on your Website or Blog at Zero Cost.
rate-content

SMS Rating

Gives You Power to Rate Content.
« Stay In Touch »

Quality Improvement Initiative

Quality Improvement Program

On September 13, 2015 we took an initiative towards delivering high quality content. With every Lazeez SMS you will find two thumbs - one for upvote and one to downvote.

Sample thumb screenshot

You can cast your vote simply by clicking on the thumb icon.