Captain of military: Naujawaan, aage badho.
Ek sardaar aage nahi badhta.
Captain: Tum aage kyon nahi badhaa, jawaan.
Sardaar: Aapne kaha 9 jawaan aage badho,
main 10ve number per hun.

20

Hindi

Santa joined Army, given ak-47, puzzeled Santa asks Major,
"Sir, is bandook ki nali saamne rakhun ya ulta?"
Major: Kisi bhi tarah rakho, faayedaa desh ka hi hoga.

10

Hindi

एक बार संता अपनी पत्नी जीतो के साथ कॉफी पीने जाता है और
दो हॉट कॉफी ऑर्डर करता है,
कुछ देर बाद जैसे ही वेटर कॉफी लेकर आता है तो संता, जीतो से कहता है:
संता: ओ जीतो जल्दी-जल्दी कॉफी पी ले अगर ठण्डी हो गई तो फ़ालतू में ज्यादा पैसे देने पड़ेंगे!
जीतो: क्यों क्या हुआ? मुंह जलवाने से तो अच्छा है कि, यह थोड़ी ठंडी हो जाए उसके बाद पिएं!
संता: पागल तूने इनकी रेट लिस्ट नहीं देखी, हॉट कॉफी 15 रुपए और कोल्ड कॉफ़ी 45 रुपए की है!

- Hemant Singh
22

Hindi |

Santa : Mere 4 beto me se 3 to engineer ban gaye,
Lekin kambakht ek DAAKU ban gaya.
Banta: To usko ghar se nikal do,
Santa : Yai to dikkat hai,
kama ke To sirf wahi lata hai.

01

Hindi

Santa and Banta bought a horse each.
Santa : How will we know which is your & which is mine?
Banta: Easy, I'll cut mine's tail, yours will be the one with tail.

This was heard by a few boys, they cut the other's tail too.
Next morning the confusion continued.
Banta: Don't worry, I'll tie a bell around its neck, yours will be the one without the bell.

The boys heard this also & cut the bell. The next day, Banta got frustrated & said
"Okay now the last criterion, white will be yours & black will be mine."

00

English |

Santa : Yaar uth bhookamp aa rahaa hai..saara ghar hil raha hai.
Banta: Soja-soja ghar girega to makaan maalik ka..hum to kiraayedaar hain..

10

Hindi

Aurato se Bhari bus ka Accident ho gaya.
Sari Ladies mar gayi.
Sbke pati 1-1 ghante roye
santa akela pura din Roya..
Q.??

Kyonki uski patni ki Bus Chhoot gyi thi
No jokes pls.
Aaj santa serious hai.

20

Hindi |

Santa ko sapne me kisi ne goli maar di!!
2nd day Santa ne apna bank account close karwa diya kyonki
bank mein likha tha - hum aapke sapno ko hakikat mein badal denge.

10

Hindi

Santa saw a beautiful girl,
he went and kissed her.
Girl: "STUPID what are you doing..?"
Santa : B.Com final year.

113

English |

Once in a crowded bus Santa ka paon ek ladke ke paon pe aa gaya.
Santa : Sorry.
Ladka: Shut up.
Kuch der baad ek ladki ka paon ladke ke paon pe aa gaya .
Ladki: Sorry.
Ladka: Its Ok.
Santa : Na meri sorry de spelling ghalt c..?

11

Punjabi |

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