54Father: What were the two hardest things
you learnt in the college..?
Son: Opening beer bottles with teeth &
lighting 10 cigarettes with onle one match stick..
English
51Teacher: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree,
but also admitted it.
So do you know why his father didn't punish him?
Student: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
English |
130A student wrote a letter to his father from hostel,
Dear dad: No money. No fun. Your son.
His father replied: So sad. Very bad. Your dad.
English |
151Kaash koi exam result ka insurance karwaa deta,
to har exam ke pehle premium bharwaa dete,
paas hote to theek,
warna insurance claim karwaa lete..
Hindi
120A girl comes late to class.
Prof: Why are you late?
Girl: Sir, a boy was following me.
Prof: Then how come you are late?
Girl: The boy was walking too slow.
English
150Father: Tere result da ki baniya..?
Son: Dr. sahib da munda fail ho gaya.
Father: Te tera result..?
Son: Headmaster sahib da munda v fail ho gaya.
Father: Tu apna te dass.
Son: Khanna sahib da munda v fail hai.
Father: Kanjra tera result ki hai..?
Son: Tussi kehra bill gates ho, tuhada munda v fail ho gaya..
Punjabi
184Teacher: Tum bade hokar kya karoge?
Student: Shadi karunga.
Teacher: Nahi, mera matlab hai kya banoge?
Student: Dulha banunga.
Teacher: Oh ho! Papa tumse kya chaahte hain?
Student: Pota.
Teacher: Hey Bhagwaan! abey zindagi ka kya maksad hai?
Student: Hum do, humaare do.
Hindi
82Dad: Beta, is baar 80% number leyaane aa tu paperaan ch.
Pappu: Don't worry dad, main 100% leaanwaagaa.
Dad: Kanjaraa, mazaak kardaa hai mere naal?
Pappu: Pehla mazaak kehde kanjar ne shuru kita si..
Punjabi
71Teacher: (1)There is a frog, (2)Ship is sinking,
(3)potatoes cost Rs 3/kg. Then, what is my age..?
Student: 32 yrs.
Teacher: How do you know..?
Student: Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.
English |
123Student to God : Hazaaron ki kismat tere haath thi,
agar paas kar dete to kya baat thi..
God replied: Ishq thoda kam ladaate to kya baat thi,
kitaabe to saari tere paas thi..
Hindi
61Principal: Late kyun aaye?
Student: Bike broke down.
Principal: Bus mein nahi aa sakte the?
Student: Maine bola tha sir,
par aapki beti ke nakhre bade hain..
Hindi
110Raj: Meet my wife Divya.
Sunil: Oh! i know her.
Raj: Know her..How?
Sunil: We'd been sleeping together.
Raj: What the hell..
Sunil: 10 years ago..in the history class.
English
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