13Who Killed Osama Bin Laden??
- Sumit Nigam
ROBIN BROWN, ANDY PHILIP, JAKOB MURPHY,
NORMAN GRACE, IAN KEPLING??
Recognized these guys?
These are the names of those Navy Seals
who killed Osama Bin Laden!
Now you..
English |
![jokes.jpg jokes.jpg](/sms/new/img/jokes.jpg)
01A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martin us.
"You mean a martini?" the bartender asks.
The Roman replies,
"If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!"Details:
Most words that end in "us" are pluralized by changing the "us" to "i"
(e.g. cactus - cacti, genius - genii, Stimulus - stimuli) and most of those words have Latin roots. So the Latin scholar thinks of "martini" as being plural, so he singularises it by calling it a "martinus".
English |
20A lady was driving for the first time on a highway.
Her husband called on her cellphone -
Be careful Honey, it's coming on radio that
somebody is driving on the wrong side of the road.
Lady replied - Somebody..?
Those stupids are in hundreds..
English |
123Doctor paagal se: Yeh chithi tum kise likh rahe ho..?
Paagal: Apne aap ko.
Doctor: Achcha isme kya likha hai.
Paagal: Maalum nahi.
Doctor: Kyu..?
Paagal: Abhi mujhe mili kahaan hai..!
Hindi
72Saddam(Narak mein): Yamraaj ji, mujhe pakistan baat karni hai.
Yamraaj: Karlo.
After the call..
Saddam: Kitne rupae hue..?
Yamraaj: Narak to narak calls free hain.
Hindi
62Banana: Why are you crying?
Apple: All of them cut and eat me.
Banana: Poda! You are better than me.
All of them remove my dress & eat me.
English
32Hansa: AUTOMATICALLY matlab?
Praful: Jab auto mein baith kar koi ladki ganji ho jaaye
to usko kehte hain,
AUTO-MEIN-TAKLI!!!
Hindi
14Pathan - Moulvi sahab, wazu ke baghair namaz ho jaati hai?
Moulvi - Nahi hoti.
Pathan - Ho jaati hai.
Moulvi - Bhai, nahi hoti.
Pathan - Ho jaati hai, maine khud padh kar dekhi hai..
Hindi |
21A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.
A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.
At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"
English |
83Engg. Student: Sir humne aisi cheez banayi hai jisse hum
- Vikas Umrao
deewar ke us paar bhi dekh sakte hain.....
Sir: Wow, fantastic! Kya hai woh?
Student:
Suraakh.......
Hindi |
70Anaath Ashram Manager to Bania:
- Hemant Singh
Sethji, aap hamare anaath ashram ke liye kya kar sakte ho ?
Funny Bania: Mein anaath ashram mein apne Char bachhe bhej sakta hu.
Hindi |
20Policeman: Sir, how did you come to have this accident?
Motorist: Well, the sign just there says, Stop? Look? Listen . and
while i was doing that
the train hit me.
English
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