Physics would have been much, much easier
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if
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if
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the tree itself had fallen on Newton's head instead of the apple!

14

English |

funny.jpg

A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.

A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.

At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"

21

English |

A small boy wrote letter to Shivji:
Oh my dear God , please give me a bicycle.
One week passed. Usko cycle nahi mili.
Tab usne Ganesh ji ki moorti dekhi aur
use apne ghar le aaya.
Again he wrote a letter..
Mr Shivji, aapka beta mere kabze mein hai,
agar beta chaahiye to give me a bicycle in 24 hours..

10

Hindi

Heights of :
1) Fashion?
Lungi with a zip.
2) Laziness?
Asking lift for morning walk.
3) Craziness?
Get blank paper xerox.
4) Honesty?
Pregnant woman taking 2 tickets.
5) De-hydration?
Cow giving milk powder.
6) Hope?
A 99 yr. Old woman going for Rs. 295/- recharge to get lifetime incoming.
7) Stupidity?
Looking through key hole of a glass door.
8) Height of free time?
You are reading this whole message..

10

English |

Ghollu: Yaar mhari madam nu kahve thi, ke bhais ka dhoodh peen teh dimaag tej hove h.

Mollu: Gappe mare hai susri, jo nu hotta to mhara katra engineer na hotta..?

20

Hindi |

Ye Mera New No. Hai - 9953723352.

Plz save kar lena..
Or Haan ek baat suno...
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Maze ki baat to dekho purana bhi yahi hai..

- Vikas Umrao
81

Hindi |

At Traffic Signal Boy Friend to Girl Friend :
Jaan main tumhari aankhon main sara jahan dekh sakta hu.
Pass me ek ladka without helmet khada tha.
Yeh sunte hi bola: Bhai sahab, mujhe sirf itna bata do ki
Aage chaurahe par Helmet ki checking ho rahi hai ya nahi..

- Hemant Singh

32

Hindi |

A kid went late for school.
Teacher : Why are you late ?
Kid : Madam, my parents were fighting.
Teacher: So what If they were fighting,
still you could have come on time.
Kid : Actually, my one shoe had been taken by dad and other by mom.

- HARRY
00

English |

Patient: Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai
uske haath lagte hi main theek ho gaya.
Doctor: Jaanta hun,
chaante ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi.

53

Hindi

Sheher ki gali mein paan ki dukan
Devdas ne dekhi Paro ki muskan
Devdas ne khilaya Paro ko paan
Khaa ke paan Paro boli "Shukriya Bhaijaan"..

70

Hindi |

Dus saal pehle: Girl-Maa mein jeans pehen loo?
Maa-Nahi.
Now-a-days: Girl-Maa mein mini pehen loo?
Maa-Pehen le beti kuch to pehen le..

21

Hindi

Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?
Sam: No sir, I don’t have to, my mom is a good cook.

20

English |

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