Driver: Sir, which way to turn, left or right?
Santa : Jaha se tyre puncture ho jaaye ya gaadi kharaab ho jaaye.
Driver: Kya keh rahe ho sir..?
Santa : Haan, tabhi to main paise kam doonga.

02

Hindi |

Santa went to the see Jurassic Park movie and
when he saw Dinosaurs approaching he covered his head in his seat.
Banta: Oye santea, ki hoyea..? Movie hi te hai.
Santa : Oye khoteya, Dinosaur nu thode pata hai ki movie hai..
Jaanwar da ki bharosa.

10

Punjabi |

Santa was eating banana without peeling.
Someone asked why don't you peel and eat.
Santa : It's not required as i know what's inside.

10

English |

How a romantic jatt will propose a girl?????
Teri boothi local bus wargi, mera ticket kataaun nu jee kardaa,
teri tor ni sohniye meri majh vargi, mera sangal paun nu jee kardaa.

20

Punjabi

संता बड़ी देर से अपने कमरे में कुछ ढूंढ़ रहा था, परेशान होकर उसकी पत्नी जीतो बोली;
जीतो: तुम इतनी देर से क्या ढूंढ़ रहे हो?
संता: हिडन कैमरा!
जीतो: तुम्हें ऐसा क्यों लगा इस कमरे में हिडन कैमरा लगा है?
संता: अगर यहाँ हिडन कैमरा नहीं लगा होता तो टी.वी. में आ रहे इस आदमी को कैसे पता होता कि हम स्टार प्लस देख रहे हैं, बार-बार यह आप देख रहे हैं स्टार प्लस क्यों बोल रहा है?

- Hemant Singh

20

Hindi |

A sardaar prays daily for two hours:
Hey Waheguru, meri lottery lagaa davo.
After 11 years Waheguru angrily appears and says:
Oye Khoteyaa, ik vaari ticket taan lae..

30

Punjabi

Santa to nauker: Ped-podho ko paani daal de.
Nauker: Saabji, baahar to baarish ho rahi hai.
Santa : Abey paagal, to chattri le ke daal de!

01

Hindi

मंगल ग्रह पर पानी मिलने की खबर सुन कर
संता नासा फ़ोन करता है .
संता : ओ जी यह मंगल पर पानी मिल गया आपको ..?
नासा : यस
संता : ओ जी मुबारक हो जी..इक्क बोतल पानी चाहिदा सी
नासा : सॉरी , वी कांट गिव
संता : ओह ले ..इतना पैसा खर्चा करके
पानी भी ढून्ढ लित्ता है ते दे वी नहीं रहे
बन्दा धोने क्या मंगल पे जाएगा ..

Mangal greh par paani milne ki khabar sun kar
Santa NASA phone karta hai.
Santa : O ji yeh mangal par paani mil gaya aapko..?
NASA: Yes
Santa : O ji mubaarak ho ji..Ikk botal paani chaahida si
NASA: Sorry, we can't give.
Santa : Oh le..itna paisa kharchaa karke
paani bhi dhoond litta hai te de v nahi rahe
banda dhone kya mangal pe jaayega..

00

Hindi |

Santa was experimenting with a cockroach.
He cut one of his legs and told it to walk.
The cockroach began moving slowly.
He continued till all legs were cut.
Then he told it to walk, but it didn't move.
So he wrote the inference:
If all the legs of a cockroach were cut,
it loses it's ability to hear.

10

English

Santa : Aaj maine paani ko ullu bana dia.
Banta: Paani ko ullu..? Woh kaise..?
Santa : Oye! Subah maine paani garam kiya aur fir thande paani se naha liya..

00

Hindi |

Sardaarji aapko logo ne kyon maara..?
Sardaar: Arrey yaar meri photo bus mein gir gayi thi.
Maine kaha, madam zaraa saree upar karna,
mujhe photo leni hai.

01

Hindi

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