Judge: why are you arrested..?
Santa : For shopping early.
Judge: Well, that’s not a crime,
anyway how early were you shopping?
Santa : Before opening the shop.

00

English |

Santa raat ko machardaani laga kar so raha tha,
Achanak ek jugnoo aa gaya..
Santa : Lo ye machar humko
Torch le kar dhoondh raha hai.

00

Hindi |

Santa : Mujhe shadi mein BMW mili hai..!
Banta: Par tumhare pass toh koi car nahi hai..?
Santa :Abe gadhe, BMW ka matlab
Bahut Moti Wife ..

11

Hindi |

Santa went to a shop with the Indian Flag and
asked the shop-keeper to show more colors for it..

00

English |

A Chinese was in a hospital.
Santa went to meet him.
Chinese said CHING CHONG, MOU.CHU CHA & died.
Santa went china to know the meaning, that was:
You are standing on the Oxygen pipe..

20

English |

Santa & Banta were having dinner.
Banta - Pass the wine, you divine.
Santa thought, how poetic.
So he replied - Pass the custard, you bastard..

00

English |

Santa and Banta were playing chess.
Santa : Let's wrap up.
Banta: Yeah, anyways just your rook
and my knight are left..

Then Vishwanathan Anand comes there.
VA: Come, let's play chess.

Santa -Banta: No way, you will beat us.
VA: Ok.. You both can play as a team.
Santa -Banta: Still we will lose.
VA: Ok, i will play with left hand.
Santa -Banta: Yeah, then it's fine.

Obviously, Santa Banta lost the game and VA leaves.
Santa : It was shameful, he beat us even with left hand.
Banta: He fooled us.
Santa : How?
Banta: He must be left-handed.

01

English |

Santa : Jab me chota tha to ek baar kutub minaar se gir gaya tha.
Banta: Acha!! to mar gya ya bach gya.
Santa : Saale.! mujhe kya pata, me to chota tha...

20

Hindi |

Do bhoot galaan kar rahe si.
Pehla bhoot: Yaar tu kadi sardaar dekhe ne?
Doosra bhoot: Sardaar-sardoor kuch ni hunde,
sab mann da vehm hai, dari na.

21

Punjabi

Santa in london went to hotel to eat chicken.
He forgot the english name.
Waiter: What do you like to have, sir?
Santa : Egg's mother..

10

English

Banta - What is pin-drop darkness?
Santa - If you drop a pin and can't find it
then it is pin-drop drakness..

00

English |

Santa ped pe chada to upar baithe bandar ne poocha: Upar kyon aaye ho?
Santa : Apple khane.
Bandar: Yeh to aam ka ped hai.
Santa : Pata hai, apple saath laya hoon..

00

Hindi |

Recommended for You »

  1. Waada To Nahi Karte Ki Dosti Nibhayenge Par Itna To Hai ..
  2. A Ministar Exhibits Brilliance And A Minister Everything Else ..
  3. Ameer Hue To Itnay Ki Sab Kuch Unhi Per Luta ..
  4. Taqdeer Ke Likhe Par Kabhi Shikwaa Na Kar Tu Abhi Itna Samajhdaar ..
  5. Boy Main Keha Sohneyo Jutti Te Badi Sohni Paai Hoi ..
  6. The Only Way To Keep Your Health Is To Eat What ..
  7. The Unexamined Life Is Not Worth Living Socrates ..
  8. Kid I Need A Burger Santa But That S Stale ..
  9. Priya Mitr Namaskaar Aapke Sandesh Padne Ke Upraant Hum Atyant Aanand Vibhor Ho ..
  10. A Government May Offer Us Many Things But What Counts Most ..

Share & Let Everyone Read









Draw shape below and click submit button to send us your message:
आओ खेलें

लाल बूढ़क्की छू..

anagram quiz

About Us


Our logo expands to iOLdot - Ik Oankaar Lazeez Dimension of Texting which tries to reflect our ideology.

The purpose of this website is to develop a Dimension to Texting through the Aesthetics of Words by providing Unique, Decent, Pleasant, Pure, Gentle, Clean, Refined, Inoffensive Thought Provoking Wisdom Quotes, Funny Jokes, Shayari, Motivational SMS, Greetings, Wishes, Proverbs, Dohe, Love Messages & much more.. We also encourage you to be part of this journey & share your creative content with us. Play your flute here..



What's more


moderated-content-kids-safe

Moderated Content

Safe for people of all Age Groups including Children.
sms-api-always-win

API

Display SMS on your Website or Blog at Zero Cost.
rate-content

SMS Rating

Gives You Power to Rate Content.
« Stay In Touch »

Quality Improvement Initiative

Quality Improvement Program

On September 13, 2015 we took an initiative towards delivering high quality content. With every Lazeez SMS you will find two thumbs - one for upvote and one to downvote.

Sample thumb screenshot

You can cast your vote simply by clicking on the thumb icon.