A Policeman Stops A Lady And Asks For Her License. He Quotes

A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says, "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
Policeman: "I don't care who you know! You're getting fined!"

Ye Mera New No. Hai - 9953723352.

Plz save kar lena..
Or Haan ek baat suno...
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Maze ki baat to dekho purana bhi yahi hai..

Soldier: Sir, i want 1 week leave to go home.
Senior: I will give you one month leave if you will caught enemies tank.

After some time.
Soldier: Sir, i have caught the enemies tank, it is standing outside.
Senior (astonished): Great! How did you managed that.
Soldier: Sir, when enemies soldiers need leave
they also borrow tank from us.

Funny Slogans
RTO - Donate blood, but not on road.
Forest Deptt. - Shoot birds with camera,
not with guns.
Kingfisher - Fly with us, not on plane,
but with Beer..

A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.

A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.

At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"

Saddam(Narak mein): Yamraaj ji, mujhe pakistan baat karni hai.
Yamraaj: Karlo.
After the call..
Saddam: Kitne rupae hue..?
Yamraaj: Narak to narak calls free hain.

Ek Chinti aur Haathi ko Prem ho gaya..
Chinti ke Maa-Baap ne Shaadi se inkar kar diya..
Reason poocha to kaha:
Ladke ke daant Baahar hai!!