Judge: Sach-sach batao tumne apni biwi per haath kyun uthaaya..?
Mulzim: 3 baaton ki wajah se
1. Uska chehra meri taraf nahi tha
2. Uske haath mein belan nahi tha
3. Aur sabse badi wajah,
mere bhaagne ke liye darwaaza khula tha..

00

Hindi |

funny.jpg

A famous inspirational speaker said -
'Best years of my life were spent
in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife !'
Audience was in shock and silence.
He added -
'She was my mother.'
Applause & Laughter.
A top manager tried to crack this at home.
After a drink he said loudly to his wife , in kitchen -
'Best years of my life were spent
in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife !'
Standing for a moment
trying to recall the second half, he finally blurted out -
'I can't remember .'

10

English

Ladka: Mere saath chalogi.?
Ladki: Kaha?
Ladka: Jaha tum kaho.
Ladki: Ok, police station chalte hain.
Ladka: Lo bataao ab banda apni behen se mazaak bhi nahi kar sakta.

62

Hindi

Mrs. Dahi & Bhalla request the pleasure of ur company
to attend the marriage of their son
Kaka Gol Gappa WEDS Bibi Paapdee(D/O Mrs. Kachori & Mr. Samosa of Tikkipur)
at Pastry Hall on 05 Nov 1983, near Jalebi Chowk, Lijjat Papad Nagar.
PIN:420840
Mele chachu ki shaadi mein jalul aana..
Baby boondi., RSVP Masaaley.

11

Hindi

Dil aur Duniya Me Sirf Itna Frq Hai
K Is Duniya Me Bahut Log Rehte Hain
aur Is Dil mein SIRF
Aap
KI
"BHABHI" Rehti hai,
saalo har jagah khud ko mat ghusaya karo.

40

Hindi

A man in US saw a dog about to bite a lady.
He kicks the dog & the dog dies.
Newspaper reports - Brave US citizen saves lady from dog.
Man told newspapers that he is not a US citizen,
so report changed - Foreigner saves lady from dog.
Man told that he hails from Pakistan.
Report got changed - Terrorist attacked local dog.

11

English |

Dil ko pata tha woh jaroor aayegi,
Dil ko pata tha woh jaroor aayegi,
par kabhi socha na tha ki woh..
surprise mein apna husband bhi saath laayegi.

01

Hindi

Customer: Waiter, do you serve pigs..?
Waiter: Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.

31

English |

A little boy who wanted 100 rupees.
He decided to write a letter to God .
When the postal authorities received the letter to " God "
they decided to send it to President.
The president was so impressed, touched, and amused
that he instructed his secretary
to send the little boy a 50 rupees.
The little boy was delighted with the money,
and immediately sat down to write
a thank you note to God which read
"Dear God , Thank you for sending me the money.
However, I noticed that for some reason
you had to send it through New Delhi, and as usual,
those people deducted 50 rupees."

10

English |

Ek shaks doctor ke paas aaya aur bola:
Doctor sahib, mujko ek bimari hai.
Doctor ne kaha bola kya bimari hai..?
Usne jawab diya: Mujhko aawaz dikayi nahi deti..

- Salman Ali

30

Hindi |

Maine kaha Dilruba,
usne kaha Ice-Cream khilaa..
Maine kaha Paise nahi,
usne kaha Aise nahi..
Maine kaha mehngaai hai,
usne kaha Tu bhi mera bhai hai..

93

Hindi

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