20Santa was filling a slambook.
He didn't knew the meaning of Zodiac sign.
He turned the previous page and
saw that somebody had written Cancer,
so he wrote Gas Problem..
English
10Santa ek jyotish ke paas kundali (horoscope) dikhaane gaya.
Jyotish: Tera naam Santa hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tujhe 2 ladki aur 1 ladka hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tune abhi 10 kg rice khareede hain.
Santa : Maharaj ki jai ho.
Jyotish: Bewakoof ! Kundali dikha, Ration Card nahi..
Hindi |
20Santa : Sir, meri patni mere saath baahar jaana chahti hai chhutti chahiye.
Boss : Nahi milegi.
Santa : Shukriya sir, jaanta tha musibat ke waqt aap hi kaam aayenge..!
Hindi |
40Nurse: Mubaarak ho Mr. Santa ,
aap Papa ban gaye!!
Santa : Meri wife ko nahi bolna,
main use surprise doonga!!
Hindi
00Santa pravachan sun ke ghar aaya
aur apni biwi ko godh mein utha liya.
Biwi: Pravachan mein romance sikhaya hai kya?
Santa : Nahi, pravachan mein kaha ki apne dukhon ko khud uthaao.
Hindi
00Sardaar gives dictation test for the students.
Last bench student says that we are unable to hear,
so the sardaar replies,
ok i'll write on the board.
English
00After returning back from a foreign trip,
santa asked his wife : Do I look like a foreigner..?
wife : No! Why..?
santa : In London a lady asked me, Are you a foreigner..
English |
00Accident ke baad.
Driver: Maine car ki headlight ON kar ke bataya tha ki
pehle mjhe nikalne do.
Santa : Maine bhi to wiper chala ke bataya tha ki 'na kaake na'.
Hindi
10Santa : Ek chor ne mujhe chaku dikha ke lut liya,
Banta: Tere paas to hamesha gun hoti hai..?
Santa : Haan.. 2 lakh ki hai
maine chupaa li thi varna woh bhi le jaata..
Hindi |
10TV reporter to Santa : Can you tell me
how many jokes are there on you?
Santa : Hardly 2 or max 3,
the rest are all true stories.
English
20A ship was sinking.
Captain: Does any one know how to pray?
Santa comes forward and says he can pray.
Captain: Ok Santa , you pray;
Everyone else in ship will wear a life jacket
as we are one jacket short.
English |
3414Santa ne ek naamcheen karamaati insaan se poocha:
Aap meri sharab churwa sakte ho..?
Karamaati: Haan kyun nahi.
Santa : To police ne meri 22 bottlein pakri hain. Churwa do.
Hindi |
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