Kaash koi exam result ka insurance karwaa deta,
to har exam ke pehle premium bharwaa dete,
paas hote to theek,
warna insurance claim karwaa lete..

151

Hindi

Height of Challenge
In an exam a student just writes one line
leaving the rest of the answer sheet blank:
Pass me, if you have can.

72

English

Teacher: Dhritrashtra ke 100 putra the aur
Paandu ke sirf 5, aisa kyun..?
Student: Madam, jinki aankhein hoti hain,
unhe aur bhi kaam hote hain..

90

Hindi

Father: Tere result da ki baniya..?
Son: Dr. sahib da munda fail ho gaya.
Father: Te tera result..?
Son: Headmaster sahib da munda v fail ho gaya.
Father: Tu apna te dass.
Son: Khanna sahib da munda v fail hai.
Father: Kanjra tera result ki hai..?
Son: Tussi kehra bill gates ho, tuhada munda v fail ho gaya..

150

Punjabi

Teacher: (1)There is a frog, (2)Ship is sinking,
(3)potatoes cost Rs 3/kg. Then, what is my age..?
Student: 32 yrs.
Teacher: How do you know..?
Student: Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.

71

English |

Student to God : Hazaaron ki kismat tere haath thi,
agar paas kar dete to kya baat thi..
God replied: Ishq thoda kam ladaate to kya baat thi,
kitaabe to saari tere paas thi..

123

Hindi

Ek baccha roz math teacher ko phone lagata tha.
Teacher's wife : Kitni baar kaha, wo mar gaye hain,
baar-baar phone kyun karte ho ?
Baccha: Sun ke achha lagta hai..

161

Hindi |

Chemical Joke:
All electrons were having party.
Suddenly protons attacked them.
A hero comes and saves them.
They asked who are you?
He said: I am Bond..Covalent Bond..

132

English

Syllabus tough hai to kya hua
mil kar parchi chala-enge..
Upar se nahi to na sahi
hum niche se hi top kar dikhaayenge..

52

Hindi |

Dad: Beta, is baar 80% number leyaane aa tu paperaan ch.
Pappu: Don't worry dad, main 100% leaanwaagaa.
Dad: Kanjaraa, mazaak kardaa hai mere naal?
Pappu: Pehla mazaak kehde kanjar ne shuru kita si..

82

Punjabi

Teacher: Why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor..?
Student: You told me to do it without using tables.

43

English |

Teacher: Tum bade hokar kya karoge?
Student: Shadi karunga.
Teacher: Nahi, mera matlab hai kya banoge?
Student: Dulha banunga.
Teacher: Oh ho! Papa tumse kya chaahte hain?
Student: Pota.
Teacher: Hey Bhagwaan! abey zindagi ka kya maksad hai?
Student: Hum do, humaare do.

184

Hindi

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