Santa : Mere 4 beto me se 3 to engineer ban gaye,
Lekin kambakht ek DAAKU ban gaya.
Banta: To usko ghar se nikal do,
Santa : Yai to dikkat hai,
kama ke To sirf wahi lata hai.

01

Hindi

Satna: Ek bar mere upar se scooter nikal gaya,
par fir bhi mujhe kuch nahi hua.
Banta: Yeh to kuch bhi nahi.
Ek bar mere upar se aeroplane nikal gaya,
aur main fir bhi bach gaya.

- Hemant Singh
30

Hindi |

How a romantic jatt will propose a girl?????
Teri boothi local bus wargi, mera ticket kataaun nu jee kardaa,
teri tor ni sohniye meri majh vargi, mera sangal paun nu jee kardaa.

20

Punjabi

Santa proposed a girl.......
Girl: I am one year elder to u.
Santa : Oye, no problem sohniye, I will marry u next year.

00

English

Santa : Sir, meri patni mere saath baahar jaana chahti hai chhutti chahiye.
Boss : Nahi milegi.
Santa : Shukriya sir, jaanta tha musibat ke waqt aap hi kaam aayenge..!

20

Hindi |

Santa returns book to library, bangs it on table & says - What a shit..?
"I read the whole book, too many character, no story at all"..?
Librarian: So, you are the one who took the Telephone Directory..

00

English |

Teacher : 100 dollars can be divided into how many people
if each person should get 30 dollars?
Santa : Unlimited.
Teacher : Are you nuts?
You can't do that.
Santa explains and teacher faints..

Details:
Santa : I will give 30 dollars to 3 people
and then will take back from them and
then I will give those to another 3 people
and then take back from them too
and so on..

00

English |

Santa in london went to hotel to eat chicken.
He forgot the english name.
Waiter: What do you like to have, sir?
Santa : Egg's mother..

10

English

Santa opens the door of his car,
when suddenly another car came along
and hit the door,
ripping it off completely.
Santa to Police Officer: Look what they've done to my Car! He whined.

"You are so materialistic, you make me sick!", retorted the officer.
"You're so worried about your car,
that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!"

"Oh no!", replied Santa ,
finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm once was.
"Where's my Rolex..?!"

10

English |

Teacher: How many planets are there?
Santa : Mercury, Venus, Jupiter, ...wagerah...wagerah...
Teacher: Aur batao?
Santa : Aur bas sab badhiya! Mata rani ki kirpa hai. Aap sunao.

20

Hindi

Santa went to the see Jurassic Park movie and
when he saw Dinosaurs approaching he covered his head in his seat.
Banta: Oye santea, ki hoyea..? Movie hi te hai.
Santa : Oye khoteya, Dinosaur nu thode pata hai ki movie hai..
Jaanwar da ki bharosa.

10

Punjabi |

Santa and Banta bought a horse each.
Santa : How will we know which is your & which is mine?
Banta: Easy, I'll cut mine's tail, yours will be the one with tail.

This was heard by a few boys, they cut the other's tail too.
Next morning the confusion continued.
Banta: Don't worry, I'll tie a bell around its neck, yours will be the one without the bell.

The boys heard this also & cut the bell. The next day, Banta got frustrated & said
"Okay now the last criterion, white will be yours & black will be mine."

00

English |

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