Santa and Banta started off one day for Lion hunting.
They came upon a fork in the road where a sign read
so they went home.
Santa : Yaar Banta, hum dono mein kya rishta hai?
Banta: Jo Gobar aur Uple mein hai.
Santa : Woh kaise?
Banta: Jab Gobar Santa hai, tabhi to Upla Banta hai.
Santa and Banta were playing chess.
Santa : Let's wrap up.
Banta: Yeah, anyways just your rook
and my knight are left..
Then Vishwanathan Anand comes there.
VA: Come, let's play chess.
Santa -Banta: No way, you will beat us.
VA: Ok.. You both can play as a team.
Santa -Banta: Still we will lose.
VA: Ok, i will play with left hand.
Santa -Banta: Yeah, then it's fine.
Obviously, Santa Banta lost the game and VA leaves.
Santa : It was shameful, he beat us even with left hand.
Banta: He fooled us.
Santa : How?
Banta: He must be left-handed.
Santa : Mere 4 beto me se 3 to engineer ban gaye,
Lekin kambakht ek DAAKU ban gaya.
Banta: To usko ghar se nikal do,
Santa : Yai to dikkat hai,
kama ke To sirf wahi lata hai.
Accident ke baad.
Driver: Maine car ki headlight ON kar ke bataya tha ki
pehle mjhe nikalne do.
Santa : Maine bhi to wiper chala ke bataya tha ki 'na kaake na'.
Santa went to the see Jurassic Park movie and
when he saw Dinosaurs approaching he covered his head in his seat.
Banta: Oye santea, ki hoyea..? Movie hi te hai.
Santa : Oye khoteya, Dinosaur nu thode pata hai ki movie hai..
Jaanwar da ki bharosa.
A man and a woman were fighting
on a railway station.
The lady: Ye jhaadoo dekhi hai,
ek doongi aur seedha canada pahunchega.
Santa , who was just passing by, also heard this and
immediately came to the lady,
Santa : Madam ji, jhaadoo ki kuch tillein mujhe bhi de do,
mujhe Jalandhar jaana hai.
Ik vaar Santa apne yaar de viah te
jaa ke naan zyaada khaa lenda hai,
te ghar aa ke badaa aukhaa hundaa hai
te flush wich beh ke kehndaa hai:
Rabba, ya Jaan kadh leh,
ya fer Naan kadh leh..
Santa : Aaj maine paani ko ullu bana dia.
Banta: Paani ko ullu..? Woh kaise..?
Santa : Oye! Subah maine paani garam kiya aur fir thande paani se naha liya..
Santa ji ki nayi car ke peeche likha tha
"Saawan ko aane do"
Banta ji ne peeche se truck laa kar thok diya.
Truck ke peeche likha tha
"Aaya saawan jhoom kar"
After returning back from a foreign trip,
Santa asked his Wife : Do I look like a foreigner..?
Wife : No! Why..?
Santa : In London a lady asked me, Are you a foreigner..
Nurse: Mubaarak ho Mr. Santa ,
aap Papa ban gaye!!
Santa : Meri wife ko nahi bolna,
main use surprise doonga!!
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लाल बूढ़क्की छू..
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