01Santa and Banta were playing chess.
Santa : Let's wrap up.
Banta: Yeah, anyways just your rook
and my knight are left..
Then Vishwanathan Anand comes there.
VA: Come, let's play chess.
Santa -Banta: No way, you will beat us.
VA: Ok.. You both can play as a team.
Santa -Banta: Still we will lose.
VA: Ok, i will play with left hand.
Santa -Banta: Yeah, then it's fine.
Obviously, Santa Banta lost the game and VA leaves.
Santa : It was shameful, he beat us even with left hand.
Banta: He fooled us.
Santa : How?
Banta: He must be left-handed.
English |
00Santa rail mein susu karne gayaa,
waapis aane per wife ne poocha,
Aapka pyjaama geela kaise ho gayaa?
Santa : Wahaa likha tha,
shareer ka koi bhi ang baahar na nikaale.
Hindi
10Santa ko sapne me kisi ne goli maar di!!
2nd day Santa ne apna bank account close karwa diya kyonki
bank mein likha tha - hum aapke sapno ko hakikat mein badal denge.
Hindi
30Santa made a call to airpport and asks,
"How long is the journey from Punjab to America?"
Receptionist: One second, Sir.
Santa disconnects the call the says,
"Inhe te peg laaya hoeya ae!"
Punjabi
00Santa returns book to library, bangs it on table & says - What a shit..?
"I read the whole book, too many character, no story at all"..?
Librarian: So, you are the one who took the Telephone Directory..
English |
11149How Santa bid farewell to Preeto:
Preetoji I am very sad
tussi jaa rahe ho,
tussi naa jaao.
Te je jaa hi rahe ho
te apni friend
Kammo da number de dena please
kade thoda dukh-sukh saanjha kar laange..
Punjabi |
00A kid asked Santa : Are you Punjabi?
Santa (proudly) : Yes.
Santa : But how do you know?
Kid : You are wearing a Kada.
Santa asks the kid : Are you Punjabi too?
Kid : Yes.
Santa : Do you drink Lassi daily?
Kid : No
Santa : Sorry, but then you are not a Punjabi.
Kid : Oh, I am Haryanvi.
Santa : Do you eat Ghee daily?
Kid : Yes
Santa (happily) : Yes, then you are Haryanvi..
English |
20Santa to Doctor:
Mainu ik problem hai,
gall karde hoe mainu aadmi dikhaai ni sujhdaa.
Doctor: Aisa kab-kab hota hai?
Santa : Phone karte waqt .....
Punjabi
10Banta: Cigarette pe 2 metre pipe laga kr pe raha tha.
- Tarun Goma
Santa : Tu pipe laga kar cig Q pe raha hai..?
Banta: Doctor ne kaha, Cig-Bidi se dur rehna.
Hindi |
21Santa was brought to court on charges of drunken driving.
- Tarun Goma
Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.
The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted,
“Order! Order!”
Santa responded immediately,
“Thank you , your honour! I’ll have a scotch and soda.”
English |
30Santa baar-baar zebra crossing per idhar udhar chal raha tha,
woh kya soch raha hoga?????
"Yeh Piano saala bajta kyon nahi.......???"
Hindi
00Santa went to a shop with the Indian Flag and
asked the shop-keeper to show more colors for it..
English |
♥ Recommended for You »
- Shoemaker Not Above The Sandal ..
- Everyone Has A Best Friend During Each Stage Of Life BUT Only ..
- Aaj Ki Holi Mein Aapke Sab Dukh Dard Jal Jaayein Aur ..
- Kheera Ko Munh Kaati Ke Maliyat Lon Lagaaye Rahiman Karue Mukhan ..
- Chaand Ki Manind Tasveer Hai Teri Jisko Din Raat Seene Se Liye ..
- Jeeto Kyon Ji Tussi Gaddi Di Speed Kyon Badhaa Ditti ? Santa ..
- For Religion God Is At The Beginning; For Science God Is ..
- Mehfil E Jahaan Se Yun Ruksat Hue Woh Ke Ab Kis Chiraag Se ..
- Lagtaa Nahi Hai Dil Mera Ujre Dayaar Mein Kiss Ki Baani ..
- Enlightenment Is So Common Yet We Don T Find It ..
लाल बूढ़क्की छू..
anagram quiz
About Us
Our logo expands to iOLdot - Ik Oankaar Lazeez Dimension of Texting which tries to reflect our ideology.
The purpose of this website is to develop a Dimension to Texting through the Aesthetics of Words by providing Unique, Decent, Pleasant, Pure, Gentle, Clean, Refined, Inoffensive Thought Provoking Wisdom Quotes, Funny Jokes, Shayari, Motivational SMS, Greetings, Wishes, Proverbs, Dohe, Love Messages & much more.. We also encourage you to be part of this journey & share your creative content with us. Play your flute here..
What's more
Quality Improvement Initiative
On September 13, 2015 we took an initiative towards delivering high quality content. With every Lazeez SMS you will find two thumbs - one for upvote and one to downvote.
You can cast your vote simply by clicking on the thumb icon.