A kid asked Santa : Are you Punjabi?
Santa (proudly) : Yes.
Santa : But how do you know?
Kid : You are wearing a Kada.
Santa asks the kid : Are you Punjabi too?
Kid : Yes.
Santa : Do you drink Lassi daily?
Kid : No
Santa : Sorry, but then you are not a Punjabi.
Kid : Oh, I am Haryanvi.
Santa : Do you eat Ghee daily?
Kid : Yes
Santa (happily) : Yes, then you are Haryanvi..

00

English |

Girl to sardaar- Will u marry me?
Sardaar- In our family we only marry relatives.
Mom married Dad, bhaiya married bhabhi,
didi married jiju.
So i can't marry u, Sorry..

00

English

Santa : Doctor saab mujhe chot lag gayi hai.
Doctor: Bahut gehri chot hai, taanke lagenge, 1000 Rs lagenge.
Santa : Bhutni dea, taanke laune ne, kadaai nahi karni..

00

Punjabi |

Santa pravachan sun ke ghar aaya
aur apni biwi ko godh mein utha liya.
Biwi: Pravachan mein romance sikhaya hai kya?
Santa : Nahi, pravachan mein kaha ki apne dukhon ko khud uthaao.

00

Hindi

मंगल ग्रह पर पानी मिलने की खबर सुन कर
संता नासा फ़ोन करता है .
संता : ओ जी यह मंगल पर पानी मिल गया आपको ..?
नासा : यस
संता : ओ जी मुबारक हो जी..इक्क बोतल पानी चाहिदा सी
नासा : सॉरी , वी कांट गिव
संता : ओह ले ..इतना पैसा खर्चा करके
पानी भी ढून्ढ लित्ता है ते दे वी नहीं रहे
बन्दा धोने क्या मंगल पे जाएगा ..

Mangal greh par paani milne ki khabar sun kar
Santa NASA phone karta hai.
Santa : O ji yeh mangal par paani mil gaya aapko..?
NASA: Yes
Santa : O ji mubaarak ho ji..Ikk botal paani chaahida si
NASA: Sorry, we can't give.
Santa : Oh le..itna paisa kharchaa karke
paani bhi dhoond litta hai te de v nahi rahe
banda dhone kya mangal pe jaayega..

00

Hindi |

Accident ke baad.
Driver: Maine car ki headlight ON kar ke bataya tha ki
pehle mjhe nikalne do.
Santa : Maine bhi to wiper chala ke bataya tha ki 'na kaake na'.

00

Hindi

Santa : Sir, meri patni mere saath baahar jaana chahti hai chhutti chahiye.
Boss : Nahi milegi.
Santa : Shukriya sir, jaanta tha musibat ke waqt aap hi kaam aayenge..!

20

Hindi |

Santa in london went to hotel to eat chicken.
He forgot the english name.
Waiter: What do you like to have, sir?
Santa : Egg's mother..

10

English

A Sardaar made a call to airport and
asked how long is the journey
from Punjab to America..
Receptionist: One second, sir.....
Sardaar: Thank you.

20

English

Santa & Banta were having dinner.
Banta - Pass the wine, you divine.
Santa thought, how poetic.
So he replied - Pass the custard, you bastard..

00

English |

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