Santa standing on a platform, suddenly jumps on railway track.
A man shouts Sardaarji mar jaaoge.
Santa : Maregaa to tu saale,
suna nahin train platform no. 1 par aa rahi hai.

00

Hindi

Accident ke baad.
Driver: Maine car ki headlight ON kar ke bataya tha ki
pehle mjhe nikalne do.
Santa : Maine bhi to wiper chala ke bataya tha ki 'na kaake na'.

00

Hindi

Santa was experimenting with a cockroach.
He cut one of his legs and told it to walk.
The cockroach began moving slowly.
He continued till all legs were cut.
Then he told it to walk, but it didn't move.
So he wrote the inference:
If all the legs of a cockroach were cut,
it loses it's ability to hear.

10

English

Santa wanted to make an STD call to Hoshiyarpur
but it was too expensive.
Can u guess what he did..?
He went to hosiyarpur and
made a local call.
Bolo tara ra ra..!!

01

English

Santa standing on a platform, suddenly jumps on railway track.
A man shouts Sardaarji mar jaaoge.
Santa : Maregaa to tu saale,
suna nahin train platform no. 1 par aa rahi hai.

00

Hindi

Santa 's son was filling an Application Form..
The form asked about "MOTHER TONGUE"?

Son: Papa main ethe ki likhu.?

Santa : Likh puttar
very LONG & UNCONTROLLED..

21

Punjabi |

Satna: Ek bar mere upar se scooter nikal gaya,
par fir bhi mujhe kuch nahi hua.
Banta: Yeh to kuch bhi nahi.
Ek bar mere upar se aeroplane nikal gaya,
aur main fir bhi bach gaya.

- Hemant Singh
30

Hindi |

Santa opens the door of his car,
when suddenly another car came along
and hit the door,
ripping it off completely.
Santa to Police Officer: Look what they've done to my Car! He whined.

"You are so materialistic, you make me sick!", retorted the officer.
"You're so worried about your car,
that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!"

"Oh no!", replied Santa ,
finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm once was.
"Where's my Rolex..?!"

10

English |

Santa ne apni nayi girlfriend k
kandhe pe 1st time hath rakha aur
bahut dhire se nervously bola: "I love u"
Girlfriend-"zor se Bolo''
Santa -"JAI MATA DI"

00

Hindi

Santa underwear lene gaya.
Dukaandaar ne usko Rs. 500 ka underwear dikhaya.
Santa : Roz pehn-ne wala de,
party wear nahi chaahiye.

20

Hindi

Ik vaar Santa apne yaar de viah te
jaa ke naan zyaada khaa lenda hai,
te ghar aa ke badaa aukhaa hundaa hai
te flush wich beh ke kehndaa hai:
Rabba, ya Jaan kadh leh,
ya fer Naan kadh leh..

10

Punjabi

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