00Santa rail mein susu karne gayaa,
waapis aane per wife ne poocha,
Aapka pyjaama geela kaise ho gayaa?
Santa : Wahaa likha tha,
shareer ka koi bhi ang baahar na nikaale.
Hindi
10Santa ek jyotish ke paas kundali (horoscope) dikhaane gaya.
Jyotish: Tera naam Santa hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tujhe 2 ladki aur 1 ladka hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tune abhi 10 kg rice khareede hain.
Santa : Maharaj ki jai ho.
Jyotish: Bewakoof ! Kundali dikha, Ration Card nahi..
Hindi |
10Santa : Yaar uth bhookamp aa rahaa hai..saara ghar hil raha hai.
Banta: Soja-soja ghar girega to makaan maalik ka..hum to kiraayedaar hain..
Hindi
003 chor Billu, Sonu aur Santa
Police se chhup ke 3 boriyon me ghus gaye.
Police wala aaya, usne pehli bori mein laat maari.
Billu: BOW-BOW.
Police wala: Kutta hai.
Dusri bori mein laat maari.
Sonu: MIAUU.
Police wala: Billi hai.
Teesri bori mein laat mari.
Koi aawaz nahi aayi.
Fir mari.. Koi awaz nahi..
20-25 laat mari to andar se Santa chillaaya:
Abe metric fail, AALOO kabhi bolta hai kya..
Hindi |
20Teacher: If I give you two rabbits, and two rabbits and two more rabbits then
how many rabbits you will be having..?
Santa : Seven.
Teacher: Oh! Listen carefully.
If I give you two rabbits, and two rabbits and two more rabbits then
how many rabbits you will be having..?
Santa : Seven.
Teacher: Ok. Let me ask you
If I give you two chocolates, and two chocolates and two more chocolates then
how many chocolates you will be having..?
Santa : Six.
Teacher: Good. Now tell me
If I give you two rabbits, and two rabbits and two more rabbits then
how many rabbits you will be having..?
Santa : Seven.
Teacher: How is that..?
Santa : I am already having one at home.
English |
00Tintumon: Aaj kal TV mein channel bahut kharaab aa rahe hain.
Santa : Nahi to, humaare papa ne to TataSky lagwaa liya hai,
ab to bilkul theek hain, aap apna cable check karwa lo.
Hindi |
10Teacher: Oxygen ki khoj 1858 wich hoi.
Sardaar: Thank GOD , mera janm us ton pehla nahi hoyea,
nahi te main ghut-ghut ke mar jaata.
Punjabi
10Santa : Ek chor ne mujhe chaku dikha ke lut liya,
Banta: Tere paas to hamesha gun hoti hai..?
Santa : Haan.. 2 lakh ki hai
maine chupaa li thi varna woh bhi le jaata..
Hindi |
10Santa : Ye bata ki duniya me kitne desh hai?
Banta: Kar di na paaglon waali baat,
duniya me ek hi desh hai INDIA,
baaki sab to Videsh hain..!!
Hindi |
00Teacher: Ek Din aisa aayega jab prithvi pe pani nahi rahega,
sab jeev nasht ho jayenge, prithvi tabaah ho jayegi.
Santa : Madamji, us din tuition aana hai kya..?
Hindi |
00Santa proposed a girl.......
Girl: I am one year elder to u.
Santa : Oye, no problem sohniye, I will marry u next year.
English
00Judge: why are you arrested..?
Santa : For shopping early.
Judge: Well, that’s not a crime,
anyway how early were you shopping?
Santa : Before opening the shop.
English |
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