00Judge to Santa : tum 3rd time adalat main aa rahe ho.
Tumhe sharam nahi aati..?
Santa : janab tusi ta roz hi aande ho
tuhanu ta dubb ke mar jana chaida hai.
Punjabi
10Santa : Mujhe Shadi Mein BMW Mili Hai
Banta, par Tumhare Pass Toh Koi Car Nahi Hai
Santa : Abe Gadhe
BMW Ka Matlab
Bahut Moti Wife .
Hindi
10Santa was experimenting with a cockroach.
He cut one of his legs and told it to walk.
The cockroach began moving slowly.
He continued till all legs were cut.
Then he told it to walk, but it didn't move.
So he wrote the inference:
If all the legs of a cockroach were cut,
it loses it's ability to hear.
English
20संता बड़ी देर से अपने कमरे में कुछ ढूंढ़ रहा था, परेशान होकर उसकी पत्नी जीतो बोली;
- Hemant Singh
जीतो: तुम इतनी देर से क्या ढूंढ़ रहे हो?
संता: हिडन कैमरा!
जीतो: तुम्हें ऐसा क्यों लगा इस कमरे में हिडन कैमरा लगा है?
संता: अगर यहाँ हिडन कैमरा नहीं लगा होता तो टी.वी. में आ रहे इस आदमी को कैसे पता होता कि हम स्टार प्लस देख रहे हैं, बार-बार यह आप देख रहे हैं स्टार प्लस क्यों बोल रहा है?
Hindi |
10Santa opens the door of his car,
when suddenly another car came along
and hit the door,
ripping it off completely.
Santa to Police Officer: Look what they've done to my Car! He whined.
"You are so materialistic, you make me sick!", retorted the officer.
"You're so worried about your car,
that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!"
"Oh no!", replied Santa ,
finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm once was.
"Where's my Rolex..?!"
English |
02Driver: Sir, which way to turn, left or right?
Santa : Jaha se tyre puncture ho jaaye ya gaadi kharaab ho jaaye.
Driver: Kya keh rahe ho sir..?
Santa : Haan, tabhi to main paise kam doonga.
Hindi |
00SnowPoint: Doctor, which soap you use..??
Santa : Gopal soap, Gopal paste, Gopal brush..
SnowPoint: Doctor, is Gopal an International Company..??
Santa : No, Gopal is my room-mate.
English
20Santa to Doctor:
Mainu ik problem hai,
gall karde hoe mainu aadmi dikhaai ni sujhdaa.
Doctor: Aisa kab-kab hota hai?
Santa : Phone karte waqt .....
Punjabi
30A sardaar prays daily for two hours:
Hey Waheguru, meri lottery lagaa davo.
After 11 years Waheguru angrily appears and says:
Oye Khoteyaa, ik vaari ticket taan lae..
Punjabi
21Santa & Banta Safar Te Ja Rahe See,
- Tarun Goma
Raste Wichoh Raat Ho Gayi
Te Oh Tent Laga Ke So Gaye,
Raat Nu Banta Di Akh Khuli
Ohne Santa Nu Jaga Ke Kiha
Asman Wal Dekh Ke Dass Tainu Ki Nazar Aa Riha Hai
Santa Boliya Bhut Sare Sittare
Banta Is To Ki Patta Lagda Hai
Santa : Assman Bhut Hi Khubsurat Hai Te Roshni B Hai
Banta: Oye Kanjra, Koi Sada Tent Putt Ke Lai Gya Hai..
Punjabi |
00Teacher told all students in a class
to write an essay on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except Santa .
He wrote: No match, due to rain.
English |
51Hindi teacher asks Santa : Kaal kitne prakaar ke hote hain?
Santa : O G 7 prakaar ke -
1. Local kaal
2. STD kaal
3. ISD kaal
4. Missed kaal
5. Received kaal
6. Dialled kaal aur
7. Sat Sri Akal
Punjabi |
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