20संता बड़ी देर से अपने कमरे में कुछ ढूंढ़ रहा था, परेशान होकर उसकी पत्नी जीतो बोली;
- Hemant Singh
जीतो: तुम इतनी देर से क्या ढूंढ़ रहे हो?
संता: हिडन कैमरा!
जीतो: तुम्हें ऐसा क्यों लगा इस कमरे में हिडन कैमरा लगा है?
संता: अगर यहाँ हिडन कैमरा नहीं लगा होता तो टी.वी. में आ रहे इस आदमी को कैसे पता होता कि हम स्टार प्लस देख रहे हैं, बार-बार यह आप देख रहे हैं स्टार प्लस क्यों बोल रहा है?
Hindi |
00Santa was sitting and thinking hard.
Preetoji: Kya soch rahe ho ji?
Santa : Yeh TV waalo ko kaise pataa chal gayaa?
Preetoji: Kya?
Santa : "Aap dekh rahe hain STAR PLUS."
Hindi
10Santa joined Army, given ak-47, puzzeled Santa asks Major,
"Sir, is bandook ki nali saamne rakhun ya ulta?"
Major: Kisi bhi tarah rakho, faayedaa desh ka hi hoga.
Hindi
003 chor Billu, Sonu aur Santa
Police se chhup ke 3 boriyon me ghus gaye.
Police wala aaya, usne pehli bori mein laat maari.
Billu: BOW-BOW.
Police wala: Kutta hai.
Dusri bori mein laat maari.
Sonu: MIAUU.
Police wala: Billi hai.
Teesri bori mein laat mari.
Koi aawaz nahi aayi.
Fir mari.. Koi awaz nahi..
20-25 laat mari to andar se Santa chillaaya:
Abe metric fail, AALOO kabhi bolta hai kya..
Hindi |
21Santa was brought to court on charges of drunken driving.
- Tarun Goma
Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.
The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted,
“Order! Order!”
Santa responded immediately,
“Thank you , your honour! I’ll have a scotch and soda.”
English |
10Santa : Ek chor ne mujhe chaku dikha ke lut liya,
Banta: Tere paas to hamesha gun hoti hai..?
Santa : Haan.. 2 lakh ki hai
maine chupaa li thi varna woh bhi le jaata..
Hindi |
10Santa (ladki ko chedte hue):
Hor sohneyo, ki haal aa..??
Ladki (Gusse mein)
Jo teri bhen da.
Santa : Woh to pregnant hai..
Punjabi
00SnowPoint: Doctor, which soap you use..??
Santa : Gopal soap, Gopal paste, Gopal brush..
SnowPoint: Doctor, is Gopal an International Company..??
Santa : No, Gopal is my room-mate.
English
10As pilots, Santa and Banta were trying to land an airplane.
They start descending and as they touch the ground Santa screamed:
"Get the airplane up, the runaway is ending...".
Banta swiftly gets the plane back up in the air...
They make a big turn and start descending again.
The moment they touch the ground, Santa screamed again
"Get the plane up, the runaway is ending...".
Banta swiftly gets the plane back up in the air...
They make a big turn and start descending again...
This goes on again and again...
During their fourth descent Santa says:
"Look at those stupid people,
they build this huge & expensive airport
but with such a short runaway...",
"I know" answers Banta, "But look how wide they made it...."
English |
10Santa went to the see Jurassic Park movie and
when he saw Dinosaurs approaching he covered his head in his seat.
Banta: Oye santea, ki hoyea..? Movie hi te hai.
Santa : Oye khoteya, Dinosaur nu thode pata hai ki movie hai..
Jaanwar da ki bharosa.
Punjabi |
02Bhikhari: 10rs. de do,
mobile recharge kar ke girlfriend ko call karna hai.
Santa : WAH!!
Bhikhari ne bhi girlfriend banaayi hai.
Bhikhari: Naji..girlfriend ne bhikhari banaaya hai..
Hindi |
10Couple in theatre:
Husband : Darling, mujhe to tumhaari aatma se pyaar hai,
tumhaara jism to main kutton ko daal dun!!
Santa sitting on back seat: BHOW BHOW..BHOW BHOW..
Hindi
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