Hum whiskey nahi pite, Hum rum nahi peete,
Hum gham ke naam jam nahi peete,
Agar mil jaye yaaro ki mehfil,
To khuda ki kasam hum kisi se kam nahi peete !

17131

Hindi |
alcohol.jpg

Sadak par roshni sahi
fir bhi sambhal kar chaliye
yahaan har jurm ka gunhagaar
sharaabi hi hai..

34

Hindi |

Hor peg paa de sohneya
ajj tuttan ni deni glassi..
- Song: Patiala peg laa chadi-da

47

Punjabi |

Nasha pila ke giraana to sab ko aata hai
mazaa to jab hai ke girton ko thhaam le saaqi
kahin khaali pyaale hain, kahin saagar labaalab hain
ye kya daur hai saaqi, yeh kya taqseem hai saaqi..

51

Urdu |

Santa was brought to court on charges of drunken driving.
Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.

The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted,
“Order! Order!”

Santa responded immediately,
“Thank you , your honour! I’ll have a scotch and soda.”

- Tarun Goma

21

English |
glassi.jpg

daru ki wajah se barbaad ek aadmi
apne ghar se daru ki khaali bottles fek raha tha.
Pehli fek kar bola: Teri wajah se meri naukri chali gayi.
Dusri fek kar bola: Teri wajah se mera ghar chala gaya.
Teesri fek kar bola: Teri wajah se meri biwi chali gayi.
Fir fourth uthaai to woh bhari hui nikli..bola..
tu side mein ho ja, isme tera koi kasoor thode hi hai.

8612

Hindi

Santa : Drinking te driving dono naal-naal nahi ho sakde.
Banta: Oh kyon bai, police kolo enna darda ae..?
Santa : Je speed breaker aa gaya taa peg dul jaaun..

31

Punjabi |

Narad Muni dharti par BEER pene aya.
12 botal pilane ke baad waiter bola:
Aapko chadti kyun nahi..?
Narad Muni: MAIN BHAGWAN HOO.
Waiter: Chad gayi Na!

6922

Hindi
theka-punjab.jpg

There are two things that will be believed
of any man whatsoever,
and one of them is that he has taken to drink.
- Booth Tarkington

22

English |

Ek AMLI duje AMLI nu kehanda:
Chota hunda mai kothe ton dig pya c.
2 AMLI: Tu BACH GAYA c ke mar gaya c?
1 AMLI: Salea mainu ki pata, mai oudu nikka jeya ta c.

162

Punjabi

8 Common lines after people get drunk:
1. Tu mera bhai hai!
2. Gaadi main chalaunga!
3. Main teri dil se izzat karta hu!
4. Yaar, i love her!
5. Ye mat samajh ki main pi kar bol raha hu!
6. Ek chota sa peg aur ho jaye!
7. Tu bol bhai kya chahiye, tere liye jaan hazir hai!
8. Kal se daru band!

12222

Hindi
white-wine.jpg

My manner of living is plain and I do not mean
to be put out of it. A glass of wine and
a bit of mutton are always ready. - George Washington

24

English |