Santa opens the door of his car,
when suddenly another car came along
and hit the door,
ripping it off completely.
Santa to Police Officer: Look what they've done to my Car! He whined.

"You are so materialistic, you make me sick!", retorted the officer.
"You're so worried about your car,
that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!"

"Oh no!", replied Santa ,
finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm once was.
"Where's my Rolex..?!"

10

English |

Santa : Yaar main tainu kinni baar ph. kitta,
par tu phone hi nahi chukeyaa..?
Banta: Kyon chukaan, jehdaa main apne cell wich
30 Rs. de ke gaana lagwaayea hai
ohnu fer kaun sunega?????

10

Punjabi

Santa was reading a blank paper.

Banta: ye kya hai.

Santa : meri glfrnd ka luv leter hai.

Banta: magar ye to khali hai. Santa : ajkal hum bat nahi karte.

10

Hindi

Santa went to a radio shop and started shouting,
Kamino maine PHILIPS ka radio maanga tha,
aur isko on kiya to yeh bolta hai ki,
yeh All India Radio hai..

00

Hindi

एक बार संता अपनी पत्नी जीतो के साथ कॉफी पीने जाता है और
दो हॉट कॉफी ऑर्डर करता है,
कुछ देर बाद जैसे ही वेटर कॉफी लेकर आता है तो संता, जीतो से कहता है:
संता: ओ जीतो जल्दी-जल्दी कॉफी पी ले अगर ठण्डी हो गई तो फ़ालतू में ज्यादा पैसे देने पड़ेंगे!
जीतो: क्यों क्या हुआ? मुंह जलवाने से तो अच्छा है कि, यह थोड़ी ठंडी हो जाए उसके बाद पिएं!
संता: पागल तूने इनकी रेट लिस्ट नहीं देखी, हॉट कॉफी 15 रुपए और कोल्ड कॉफ़ी 45 रुपए की है!

- Hemant Singh
22

Hindi |

Captain of military: Naujawaan, aage badho.
Ek sardaar aage nahi badhta.
Captain: Tum aage kyon nahi badhaa, jawaan.
Sardaar: Aapne kaha 9 jawaan aage badho,
main 10ve number per hun.

20

Hindi

Santa apni pockets mein pathar daal ke ghoom raha tha.
Kisi ne poocha: Aisa kyon kar rahe ho..?
Santa : Is duniya mein usi ki qadar hoti hai, jiski jeb bhaari hoti hai..

11

Hindi |

SnowPoint: Doctor, which soap you use..??
Santa : Gopal soap, Gopal paste, Gopal brush..
SnowPoint: Doctor, is Gopal an International Company..??
Santa : No, Gopal is my room-mate.

00

English

Santa was brought to court on charges of drunken driving.
Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.

The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted,
“Order! Order!”

Santa responded immediately,
“Thank you , your honour! I’ll have a scotch and soda.”

- Tarun Goma
21

English |

10 people beating a sardaar,
but he was laughing..
A man asked,
"Why are you laughing?"
Sardaar: Main Joginder hun,
yeh log mujhe Parminder samajh ke maar rahe hain!!

00

Hindi

Recommended for You »

  1. Ek Hi Zakhm Nahi Sara Badan Zakhmi Hai Dard Hairan Hai ..
  2. Try To Understand Me & Don T Disturb Me More Leave Me Alone Last ..
  3. A Couple Came Upon A Wishing Well The Husband Leaned Over ..
  4. Dream Makes Everything Possible Hope Makes Everything Work Love Makes Everything Beautiful Smile ..
  5. With Petals Of Roses Palm Full Of Holy Water Light Of ..
  6. In French Bon Jour Spanish Te Quirdo Italian Teamo Yugoslav Volim Te English Good ..
  7. मातम पुर्शी छोड़ दी आँसू बहाना रुक गया ..
  8. It Is Hard To Soar With Eagles When You Work With ..
  9. Aakhir Zindagi Ne Bhi Aaj Pooch Liya Mujh Se Kahan Hai ..
  10. What Is Innocence? Innocence Is Playing With An Empty Glass Dropping It ..

Share & Let Everyone Read









Draw shape below and click submit button to send us your message:
आओ खेलें

लाल बूढ़क्की छू..

anagram quiz

About Us


Our logo expands to iOLdot - Ik Oankaar Lazeez Dimension of Texting which tries to reflect our ideology.

The purpose of this website is to develop a Dimension to Texting through the Aesthetics of Words by providing Unique, Decent, Pleasant, Pure, Gentle, Clean, Refined, Inoffensive Thought Provoking Wisdom Quotes, Funny Jokes, Shayari, Motivational SMS, Greetings, Wishes, Proverbs, Dohe, Love Messages & much more.. We also encourage you to be part of this journey & share your creative content with us. Play your flute here..



What's more


moderated-content-kids-safe

Moderated Content

Safe for people of all Age Groups including Children.
sms-api-always-win

API

Display SMS on your Website or Blog at Zero Cost.
rate-content

SMS Rating

Gives You Power to Rate Content.
« Stay In Touch »

Quality Improvement Initiative

Quality Improvement Program

On September 13, 2015 we took an initiative towards delivering high quality content. With every Lazeez SMS you will find two thumbs - one for upvote and one to downvote.

Sample thumb screenshot

You can cast your vote simply by clicking on the thumb icon.