Santa opens the door of his car,
when suddenly another car came along
and hit the door,
ripping it off completely.
Santa to Police Officer: Look what they've done to my Car! He whined.

"You are so materialistic, you make me sick!", retorted the officer.
"You're so worried about your car,
that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!"

"Oh no!", replied Santa ,
finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm once was.
"Where's my Rolex..?!"

10

English |

एक बार संता अपनी पत्नी जीतो के साथ कॉफी पीने जाता है और
दो हॉट कॉफी ऑर्डर करता है,
कुछ देर बाद जैसे ही वेटर कॉफी लेकर आता है तो संता, जीतो से कहता है:
संता: ओ जीतो जल्दी-जल्दी कॉफी पी ले अगर ठण्डी हो गई तो फ़ालतू में ज्यादा पैसे देने पड़ेंगे!
जीतो: क्यों क्या हुआ? मुंह जलवाने से तो अच्छा है कि, यह थोड़ी ठंडी हो जाए उसके बाद पिएं!
संता: पागल तूने इनकी रेट लिस्ट नहीं देखी, हॉट कॉफी 15 रुपए और कोल्ड कॉफ़ी 45 रुपए की है!

- Hemant Singh
22

Hindi |

Santa made a call to airpport and asks,
"How long is the journey from Punjab to America?"
Receptionist: One second, Sir.
Santa disconnects the call the says,
"Inhe te peg laaya hoeya ae!"

30

Punjabi

Tutor: Write ur father's name in english.
Santa wrote "Beautiful Red Underwear"
Tutor saw and asked - Are u mad or what?????
Santa : No, his name is Sunder Lal Chadda.

00

English

Santa : Aaj mere paas paisa hai,
business hai, bangla hai,
tere paas kya hai?
Banta: Mere paas bhi paisa hai,
busines hai, bangla hai.
Santa : Oye kambakht, fir humaari maa kiske paas hai?

21

Hindi

Santa : Ek chor ne mujhe chaku dikha ke lut liya,
Banta: Tere paas to hamesha gun hoti hai..?
Santa : Haan.. 2 lakh ki hai
maine chupaa li thi varna woh bhi le jaata..

10

Hindi |

Santa went to doctor to loose weight.
Doctor: If you will run eight kilometers a day for 300 days, you will loose 34 kilos.
At the end of 300 days,
Santa called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem.
"What's the problem?" asked the doctor.
Santa : I'm 2400 kms from home..

00

English |

After returning back from a foreign trip,
santa asked his wife : Do I look like a foreigner..?
wife : No! Why..?
santa : In London a lady asked me, Are you a foreigner..

00

English |

Santa (ladki ko chedte hue):
Hor sohneyo, ki haal aa..??
Ladki (Gusse mein)
Jo teri bhen da.
Santa : Woh to pregnant hai..

10

Punjabi

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