00A man was seen fleeing down the hall of the hospital just before his operation.
"What's the matter?" he was asked.
He said, "I heard the nurse say, 'It's a very simple operation, don't worry, I'm sure it will be all right."
"She was just trying to comfort you, what's so frightening about that?"
"She wasn't talking to me. She was talking to the doctor.
English |
76Aurangzeb: Senapati batao ki hum
Shivaji ko kyun nahi dhund pa rahe hain?
Senapati: Kyunki Maharaj hum Mooghal (Mughal) hain Google nahi..
English |
20A lady was driving for the first time on a highway.
Her husband called on her cellphone -
Be careful Honey, it's coming on radio that
somebody is driving on the wrong side of the road.
Lady replied - Somebody..?
Those stupids are in hundreds..
English |
14Pathan - Moulvi sahab, wazu ke baghair namaz ho jaati hai?
Moulvi - Nahi hoti.
Pathan - Ho jaati hai.
Moulvi - Bhai, nahi hoti.
Pathan - Ho jaati hai, maine khud padh kar dekhi hai..
Hindi |
102Ladki pataane ka tarika:
Chupke se uske peeche jaa kar use daraao.
Agar woh hasi to samjho pat gai..
Agar gussa hui to zor-zor se chillao,
Didi darr gayi..Didi darr gayi..
Hindi
70Anaath Ashram Manager to Bania:
- Hemant Singh
Sethji, aap hamare anaath ashram ke liye kya kar sakte ho ?
Funny Bania: Mein anaath ashram mein apne Char bachhe bhej sakta hu.
Hindi |
01A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martin us.
"You mean a martini?" the bartender asks.
The Roman replies,
"If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!"Details:
Most words that end in "us" are pluralized by changing the "us" to "i"
(e.g. cactus - cacti, genius - genii, Stimulus - stimuli) and most of those words have Latin roots. So the Latin scholar thinks of "martini" as being plural, so he singularises it by calling it a "martinus".
English |
146Ek aadmi STD shop per phone karne jaata hai
aur STD waale ko 2 thappad maarta hai. Kyon..?????
Kyonki STD shop ke baahar likha tha,
dial karne se pehle 2 lagaayein.
Hindi
20Attachment is not when two people chat day & night..
- Gajendra Gupta
its when someone e-mail u and adds an image or data file with it..
English |
91Patient to Doctor:
Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai,
uska haath lagte hi main theek ho gayaa.
Doctor: Jaanta hun..
thappad ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi..
Hindi
11A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says, "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
Policeman: "I don't care who you know! You're getting fined!"
English |
40God made each and everyone of us unique
until he got to China.
Copy paste.. copy paste..
English |
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