Teacher To Banta: Tell Me Five Animals Living In Water? Banta: Quotes

Teacher to Banta: Tell me five animals living in water?
Banta: Frog.
Teacher: Theek hai, hor das?
Banta: Frog da peo, ohdi maa, behen te wotti..

Itne kamzor ho gaye hum aapki judaai se..
Itne kamzor ho gaye hum aapki judaai se..
ek din machchar bhi le gayaa,
uthaa ke razaai se!!

Sheher ki gali mein paan ki dukan
Devdas ne dekhi Paro ki muskan
Devdas ne khilaya Paro ko paan
Khaa ke paan Paro boli "Shukriya Bhaijaan"..

A guy walks into work with both of his ears bandaged up.
His boss asks, "what happened to you?"
The man replies "I was ironing my clothes
when my phone rang and
I accidentally answered my iron."
His boss then says "Well, that explains one ear,
what about the other one?"
The man says "Well, I had to call the doctor!"

A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martin us.
"You mean a martini?" the bartender asks.
The Roman replies,
"If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!"

Details:
Most words that end in "us" are pluralized by changing the "us" to "i"
(e.g. cactus - cacti, genius - genii, Stimulus - stimuli) and most of those words have Latin roots. So the Latin scholar thinks of "martini" as being plural, so he singularises it by calling it a "martinus".

Patient to Doctor:
Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai,
uska haath lagte hi main theek ho gayaa.
Doctor: Jaanta hun..
thappad ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi..

Salesman cheerfully greeted
the person entering showroom.
Salesman - Sir, May I help you.
Man - Ahmm..
Salesman - Sir, we have got fresh arrivals
and are offering 10 percent discount.
Man - But..
Salesman - Sir, you can also avail
extra benefits by joining our loyalty program.
What would you like to have Sir.
Man - My dog.