Santa was commiting suicide.
Banta: Ki hoya?
Santa : Yaar, meri biwi bhaag gayi mere dost ke saath.
Banta: To tu doosri shaadi kar le, suicide kyon?
Santa : Oye banteyaa main apne dost ke bina nahi reh sakta.

00

Hindi

Santa samosa wichon aaloo aaloo kha reha si
te bahar da hisa sut reha si.
Banta puchda hai ke
tu samosa cho sirf aaloo aaloo kyun kha reha hai..?
Santa : Dr. ne mainu baahar di cheezan khan to manaa kita hai..

11

Punjabi |

एक बार संता अपनी पत्नी जीतो के साथ कॉफी पीने जाता है और
दो हॉट कॉफी ऑर्डर करता है,
कुछ देर बाद जैसे ही वेटर कॉफी लेकर आता है तो संता, जीतो से कहता है:
संता: ओ जीतो जल्दी-जल्दी कॉफी पी ले अगर ठण्डी हो गई तो फ़ालतू में ज्यादा पैसे देने पड़ेंगे!
जीतो: क्यों क्या हुआ? मुंह जलवाने से तो अच्छा है कि, यह थोड़ी ठंडी हो जाए उसके बाद पिएं!
संता: पागल तूने इनकी रेट लिस्ट नहीं देखी, हॉट कॉफी 15 रुपए और कोल्ड कॉफ़ी 45 रुपए की है!

- Hemant Singh

22

Hindi |

Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes.
He got irritated..
drank poison and said
Now bite, u'll die bastards..

00

English

Santa wanted to become as famous as Newton.
So he wrote down The Fourth Law of Motion:
Loose Motion can never be done in Slow Motion!

00

English |

Santa joined Army, given ak-47, puzzeled Santa asks Major,
"Sir, is bandook ki nali saamne rakhun ya ulta?"
Major: Kisi bhi tarah rakho, faayedaa desh ka hi hoga.

10

Hindi

Santa : Every night I see monkeys
playing football in my dreams..
Doctor: Take this medicine from tonight for a week.
Santa : Can I start from tomorrow..?
Because tonight is the Final Match..

01

English |

Girl: how many apples can you eat on an empty stomach ?
Santa : I can eat 6 apples
Girl : you can eat only 1 apple on empty stomach bcoz
when you eat the 2nd apple tht's not an empty stomach..
Santa : Wow super joke I'l tell my friend ..

Santa to friend : how many apples you can eat on an empty stomach..?
friend : I can eat 10
Santa : Pagal.. 6 bolta to mast joke sunata..

11

Hindi |

Santa went to doctor to loose weight.
Doctor: If you will run eight kilometers a day for 300 days, you will loose 34 kilos.
At the end of 300 days,
Santa called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem.
"What's the problem?" asked the doctor.
Santa : I'm 2400 kms from home..

00

English |

Santa : Yaar ye SENT MESSAGE Kya hota hai?
.
.
.
.
.
Banta: Tu v bilkul khota hi hai.
Sent Message Matlab Khushboo Wala Message.

11

Hindi |

Santa : Ek chor ne mujhe chaku dikha ke lut liya,
Banta: Tere paas to hamesha gun hoti hai..?
Santa : Haan.. 2 lakh ki hai
maine chupaa li thi varna woh bhi le jaata..

10

Hindi |

Santa went to a shop with the Indian Flag and
asked the shop-keeper to show more colors for it..

00

English |

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